Tom: We keep covering Credibility Cardle’s singles as if they’ll get anywhere.
Tim: ‘We’ do? I don’t think I’ve ever brought one of his to the table. The only way I know he’s still alive is your consistent posting of every track. You’re not on his mailing list or something, are you?
Tom: Don’t worry, I’ve not gone off the deep end.
Tim: Good, because if there’s one thing I could never forgive you for, it’d be being on Matt Cardle’s mailing list.
Tom: It’s interesting – they’re still tracked by the music business because of his history, but the last three didn’t trouble the top 40; heck, two of them didn’t trouble the top 150. Which seems a shame, because he has that nice-guy look around him.
Tim: Ah, the Cheapest Video Method Ever™. Always a good sign.
Tom: But the singles are only ever sort-of-good. With the exception of his winner’s song – a cover – they’ve all been just OK. He’s talented, he’s got a voice that vaguely reminds me of Bruno Mars, and there’s nothing wrong with the music. He will no doubt maintain a core of dedicated fans for years, tour the country successfully, and attain more than most aspiring stars will.
It’s just that… well, he won the X Factor. Olly Murs didn’t manage that. One Direction didn’t manage that. Shouldn’t he be the one breaking America?
Tim: Absolutely not. It’s the Curse, you see. The Curse of The X Factor Male Winner, which takes the form of a destiny. A destiny in which there is never a second number one, and only very rarely a third top 20 hit. Never a second Syco album, and never a sell-out tour. An arena tour? You must be joking.
You’ll be invited back to the show once, to perform your first ‘proper’ single, already destined for obscurity. And then you’ll be forgotten about, and erased from history, as far as the producers are concerned. Erased and forgotten about, like a bowel movement from the day before yesterday. And about as welcome.
Tom: (Oh, the song? It’s OK, I guess.)
Tim: Doesn’t matter what the song’s like. That’s the tragedy of the Curse.