Tom: Well, that’s a horrific title.
Tim: The Junior Eurovision Song Contest doesn’t get broadcast at all in Britain, and if you listen to the random vowel howling of the Italian victor you’ll understand why. If we ignore votes, though, and look at YouTube views, Bulgaria would be the champions, and one of my regrets about the way we write these reviews is that I won’t get to see your face when you watch this.
Tom: I’m already biased against it.
Tim: Now, let’s (try to) put aside any innate irritation we may have about the age of the singer and clear precociousness of the two pianists and focus on the song, because it’s a brilliant power ballad.
Tom: Give me a moment: urgggggh. Nope, not quite enough.
Tim: The vocals are on point (if somewhat nasal), she can handle the big notes impressively well, and the backing behind the chorus is fantastic, and the instrumental middle eight gives us time to reflect on what she’s been warbling about.
Tom: What has she been warbling about, by the way?
Tim: Well, I’m afraid that’s the bad news. I’m guessing your Bulgarian’s not up to much, and that’s probably for the best because you won’t like the lyrics: she starts out by going on about how “I want one day to be a fairy or a superhero” and that she dreams of “a planet of children without hunger and fear, and war…a planet of children, hope, peace, light…the most beautiful dream”.
Tom: Oh for crying out loud. It’s like someone set out to make a song to deliberately annoy me.
Tim: Fortunately, it’s all in Bulgarian so we don’t have to hear any of that.