Jedward – Make Your Own Luck

“Utter garbage.”

Tim: I’ll say it straight up: new Jedward is utter garbage.

Tom: Yes, but they have apparently been cast in Sharknado 3.

Tim: First thought: “what?” Immediate second thought: “nope, wait, of course they have.”

Tim: You see? Garbage.

Tom: Now I’ve said before: I might not like everything they do, but I’ve got a sneaking respect for anyone with that sort of seemingly-boundless enthusiasm. But you’re right: this is terrible.

Let’s tackle one thing first: I didn’t think you could mess up the pronunciation of “luck”, but they are basically saying “make your own, look” here every single time.

Tim: Oh, God, somehow that had passed me by. How…just, yeah, how?

Tom: There isn’t really a melody. The vocals are compressed almost to the point of inaudibility. It runs out of steam after about half a minute and yet it just keeps on going.

Tim: It seems like they might be going for a just-out-of-*NSync Justin Timberlake vibe. It really, really, really doesn’t work, though.

Tom: And the video is: well, I guess they’re trying to be artsy. It doesn’t work. None of this works. It’s not even failing in an endearing fashion. It’s just… bad.

Tim: Not even a Perez Hilton cameo can save it. My main thought about it, though: how can one of them do weights and yet still have NO MUSCLES AT ALL?