Tom: I spent some time in America recently, and heard a few tracks that never made it over to these shores. Here’s one of them.
Tom: I like this song, but I have two main problems with it.
My biggest problem is this: “love like whoa”, I can understand. It’s meaningless but vaguely enthusiastic. That’s what I assumed the song was called. Then I looked it up, and it’s actually “love like woe”?
Tim: Well, presumably it’s how loving her is a bad thing, because she’s a total cow or something but the heart wants what it wants and all that bollocks. I don’t know – the lyrics are too myriad and mind-numbing to actually look through them.
Tom: My second problem is Bieber Syndrome. He’s young, male, pretty, singing meaningless perky ballads about love, and gawping into the camera. You just want to scream at him to get off your damn lawn and find some less ridiculous hair. (And that’s coming from someone whose hair is pretty ridiculous.)
Tim: I don’t know, he’s—hang on. Your starting this with ‘I have two main problems’, combined with the basic premise of this site, mean I pretty much have to defend this, and I’m not sure I really care about him enough to do that. You’re right, his hair is silly.
Tom: Musically, though, I can’t really fault it. It’s interesting, bouncy electropop – even the vinyl-back-and-forth sample he’s using seems to fit in. It’s… well, it’s good.
Tim: Tone down the autotune a bit, perhaps, but otherwise it’s okay.
Tom: Incidentally, if you also suffer from Bieber Syndrome, you may appreciate the Ready Set’s appearance on bizarre Japanese-import schadenfreude-fest Silent Library.
Tim: Every single one of them has stupid hair. Except for the one in the hat, and he’s well, wearing a stupid hat.