Simple Plan feat. Sean Paul – Summer Paradise

Everything about this is a Standard Summer Song

Tim: A bit Frencher than yesterday, in that they’re a French Canadian band, and they’ve done two versions – a French and an English one. The English one has the video, and the French one may cause occasional linguistic confusion.

Tom: I automatically started singing Jason Mraz’s “I’m Yours” along with the verse of this. The timing, instrumentation and chords are similar enough that it works startlingly well.

Tim: Ooh, you’re right, it does and all. The idea behind the translation seems to have been “translate as much as possible, unless it doesn’t scan and/or rhyme, in which case let’s not bother.” People who take things too seriously, or school French teachers, may take issue with this, but I couldn’t care less because either way it’s a fantastic summer tune.

Tom: Yep. Everything about this is a Standard Summer Song, and I mean that in a good way.

Tim: Sean Paul’s a bit of a pain, especially once you know that he wasn’t on the album cut but was added to the single release due to being significantly better known outside Canada than K’naan (Coca-Cola songs aside), but it seems that if you want a good summer beach track, you need a rapper with an annoying voice who shouts his name at the start of the song.

Tom: I’m standing by my mantra here: “it could have been worse; it could have been Pitbull”.

Tim: Him aside, there’s not much I don’t like. The ending’s not hugely exciting (though again, the album version improves it; no idea why they changed it for this), but it’s brilliantly cheerful, the French bits give it a summer holiday vibe, and anyone who doesn’t like it can go and hide until October.

Tone Damli feat. Eric Saade – Imagine

A good amount of flesh, lots of heavy petting and a church bell that’s three hours early.

Tim: I present a video with a good amount of flesh, lots of heavy petting and a church bell that’s three hours early.

Tom: I approve of precisely TWO of those things.

Tom: From the first vocals, I thought “this is going to be good”. And I was right.

Tim: Indeed you were. I like this a lot (and not just because of the flesh and heavy petting, though I won’t deny that does add a bit). One thing I really like is that it’s very much not generic, for a duet at least – when you get two people singing to each other about how lovey-dovey they are, more often than not you end up with some piano/strings ballad rather than a beat-heavy dance number like this.

Tom: Although it’s more “I’d rather be with you”, which is an odd lyric indeed when they’re actually singing it at each other. Have they considered actually getting together? They’re putting music ahead of pragmatism, really.

Tim: Yes, but when the music’s like this can you blame them? Besides, she’s theoretically still engaged, even if it does look like she’s gone on her honeymoon with this new chap, so it would be naughty if they did anything. They never even kiss.

Tom: Neither did Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.

Tim: Erm, well I suppose that’s true. Um. Any particular point you wish to make with that?

Tom: Nope, just making a cheap joke.

Tim: Fair enough. Speaking of music type, as I was quite some time ago now, it’s struck me that while technically it’s her track and he’s just featuring on it, it feels more like an Eric Saade track than a Tone Damli one. I actually quite like that, though, so there’s no complaints from me. This is GREAT.

Tom: It is. Although I was a bit surprised when it came back after the middle eight; I’d actually assumed the track was ending rather than coming back from an encore. Not that I really minded one more chorus, really.

Saturday Flashback: PULS – Ingen Som Du

Ooh, it’s Promising and Earnest Piano Intro Time.

Tim: Remember Icona Pop from a few weeks back, where I first heard the song and didn’t like it, but then I heard it again and I sort of did? Well, that, with this from a couple of months ago, but more extreme.

Tom: Ooh, it’s Promising and Earnest Piano Intro Time, isn’t it? This had better pay off.

Tom: I WANT TO DANCE. Wait, hang on, you like all of this?

Tim: Yes, even the rapping. I’m in the mood to MOVE, and the music underneath it complements it in just the right way that it works. And as for the singing and the rest of the musical bit, well that’s just great as well, from the piano opening and fairly speedy build-up, through that big drop, chorus and ever onwards.

Tom: They’re saved by a good backing melody – it’s no Penguin, but it ain’t bad.

Tim: My only complaint is the sudden quiet chorus after the build-up at about 2:20, because my instinct there is to put my hands in the air, pump my fists and go for it, but then I suddenly feel misled. MISLED, and I don’t like that. But I do like everything else about this, so I’m not so bothered.

Paw & Lina – Stolt Af Mig Selv?

From that intro I’m hoping they get known for this.

Tim: The two people who make up the (technically still ongoing) band Infernal have decided to make other music but using a different name. A bit like Cheryl Cole becoming Cheryl, but even more odd.

Tom: Still going? Blimey. British listeners will know them for “From Paris To Berlin” and not much else.

Tom: But blimey, from that intro I’m hoping they get known for this.

Tim: Now, here’s what I don’t like about this: the song is absolutely not what the intro and first verse make you think it’s going to be.

Tom: Oh. Now that’s disappointing. Because I want this to KICK IN. Wait, it did. Without wanting to seem to aggressive: what’s your problem?

Tim: Well, the strings in there, the drumming bits and the type of singing got me all lined up for a Call Me Maybe type track of lovely smile-on-your-face pop. But it isn’t, aside from that and the lead-in to the second chorus. It jumps around all over the place – plain pop, electro stuff, a tiny bit of dubstep, occasional autotune – and it just makes me wonder what’s going on.

Tom: I’m not particularly worried about what’s going on, because it’s all good. If Fun—

Tim: The pedant in me needs to point out that the band is in fact called fun., not Fun.

Tom: —fine, if “fun.” can get to number 1 with a track that never settles down into any particular pattern – and that’s a well-deserved number 1, by the way – then the occasional genre mashups that are going on here aren’t going to cause any issue.

Tim: Yes, it is all good – individually, I quite like all the bits, and wouldn’t mind a whole song of each of them, but none of them quite lives up to what the first bit was promising, which annoys me.

Tom: Really? It’s just fine by me.

Diandra – Out Of My Head

She has come out with a proper TUNE.

Tim: Recent winner of the Finnish variant of the Idol brand, Idols, she has come out with a proper TUNE. (That’s, like a CHOON, but not quite a full-on dance track. You’ll see what I mean.)

Tom: I agree. That is a TUNE. With a T.

Tim: I started listening to this up to the first chorus, thought, ‘Yeah, it’s okay,’ and swiftly stuck it in a background tab. Thirty seconds later I thought the song was about to finish, so I went back to it, and then realised it was still only in the second chorus. Now, that’s a lot of words for a fairly dull story, but it demonstrates what I’m about to say: this song has HUGE choruses, and I LOVE THEM.

Tom: There’s something about those simple, up and down the scale choruses that just work, isn’t there?

Tim: Simple? Melodically, maybe, but other than that, not a chance – there’s so much to them that calling them simple is just plain rude. It’s not all great: the first part of the middle eight goes on far too long for my liking, and that long note before the closing part is positively yearning to be followed by a key change, but that aside this song’s a right good number.

Tom: The ghost of Tony Blackburn taking you over for a moment, there. He’s right, mind you.

Lena Phillipsson – Du Följar Väl Med (SoundFactory Pride Mix)

Ehh. Don’t know what to think.

Tim: Official Stockholm Pride 2012 anthem, this is, and a remix of a single from earlier this year.

Tim: Ehh. Don’t know what to think. It’s big, it’s brash, it’s dancey – at least, it is for the most part.

Tom: Well, mainly the second part.

Tim: Yes, that’s the problem – the first verses just seem a bit dull, which is a real shame. When pretty much everything from two minutes on is as big as it is, it just seems a shame to waste the first half of the track, when you could build this up into something right from the start, especially if you’re making a remix. They’ve already made it significantly more lively than the (not remotely dull to start with) original, but, why not go all the way?

Tom: I think part of this might be the compression we’re hearing on the web version – it seems rather low-quality and dull, as if it’s been crushed within an inch of its life. I rarely hold truck with the audiophiles who claim there’s a major difference with MP3 audio… but I wouldn’t mind hearing a slightly higher-bandwidth version of it.

Tim: Yes, that may be part of it. It also doesn’t help that I have no idea what the lyrics are. Google isn’t hugely helpful with the title, and I can’t find actual lyrics anywhere. WHY CAN’T I SPEAK SWEDISH?

Saturday Flashback: Dilba – Try Again

I remember why we didn’t do it as a Saturday Reject.

Tom: “This song was in Melodifestivalen last year,” writes reader Plupp. “It was the first song on the entire festival last year,” they continue; “…it was placed LAST but was played on loop the entire year on the radio later.”

Tim: I remember this from last year. I also remember why we didn’t do it as a Saturday Reject.

Tom: I’ll say this much, Tim; these are some ridiculous outfits.

Tom: If this placed last, then I’ve got to agree: either it’s an injustice, or there were some incredible other tracks in that heat. Aside from a slightly dodgy middle eight, this sounds like it could come off any Clubland CD. Hmm. I meant that as a compliment, but it didn’t sound like it.

Tim: Well, however complimentary that may have been, I agree with you. And that’s the issue. It’s standard, bang in the middle of the road club music, as opposed to something representative of Sweden. Any Eurovision song should carry a message of ‘this is the music we do’, and this is just a bit too generic for that.

Tom: Whoa, whoa, hold on. And we brought the ‘Dinck?* No wonder we didn’t win.

What I mean is this: it’s a proper CLUB BANGER, and perhaps that makes me like it more that I should. I want to dance to this. Maybe it’s because the backing reminds me of Caravan Palace’s superb Clash, or maybe it’s just a damn good track.

*It’s a classier nickname than “The Humper”.

Tim: Oh, it is a damn good track, and a deserved radio mainstay. It’s just not a Eurovision entry. (And FYI, the official nickname is ‘The Hump’, but we’ve already discussed that more than is necessary.)

Tom: Either way, it shouldn’t have been last.

Tim: Probably not. But it’s right that it didn’t win.

Saturday Flashback: Nadia Ali – Rapture (Avicii Remix)

Out go the drums and synthy stuff, in come the pianos and tinkly stuff.

Tim: ELEVEN YEARS AGO: iiO released their track ‘Rapture‘ which was massive pretty much everywhere that had nightclubs. Or, more accurately, music in general.

A FEW YEARS BACK: Nadia Ali, who did the singing, split from producer Markus Moser.

ABOUT EIGHTEEN MONTHS AGO: she re-recorded the song, got it remixed by everyone’s favourite Swedish bloke called Tim, Avicii, and then re-released it.

IN FEBRUARY: it suddenly started getting radio airplay here, apropos of nothing in particular.

NOW: it’s June and therefore SUMMER(ish), so we’ll listen to it.

Tom: My word, that’s either excellent genes, excellent makeup, or she was ten years old when she sang the original of this. Not that it matters, of course, but, well, yes.

Tim: So, out go the drums and synthy stuff, in come the pianos and tinkly stuff. And then fairly different drums and synthy stuff, because they’re like a legal obligation or something. And to be honest, I’m not sure about this. I first looked it up because Dev, Satan’s gift to Radio 1, talked about it on the radio a while back.

Tom: I do wonder why you listen to Radio 1 if all you’re going to do is come up with witty insults about it. …wait, never mind.

Tim: I never heard Dev play it, and now I’ve listened to it – it’s less of a remix and more a completely different track.

Tom: For those of us who listen to a lot of mashups – in other words, me – that’s not a problem. Let’s not forget Tiesto’s ‘He’s A Pirate‘, which is pretty much the record-setter for how little of an original you can include to still qualify as a remix. I rather like it.

Tim: Oh, I don’t think it’s bad. It’s just that, well, the vocals are there, sure, although I’ve got to say I don’t recognise the second verse she sings. Underneath them, though, is standard ‘hurry up and finish so we can get to the epic breakdown’ piano stuff, and after that, well, like I say, a completely different track.

Like I said, I don’t dislike it – I’d probably really enjoy it if I’d not heard the original, or if it had some other vocals on it. It’s just not remotely was I was expecting, or, I suppose, hoping it would be, and that puts me off it.

Tom: It works for me. And after all, it could’ve been worse. It could’ve been dubstep.

Chris Kamara feat. Joe Public Utd – Sing 4 England

England has a long history of good football songs.

Tom: England has a long history of good football songs.

Tim: Go on then. Display your encyclopaedic knowledge.

Tom: Three Lions is the canonical one, although I’d say it’s beaten out by Vindaloo: the latter can be chanted better, didn’t come back for two extra cash-in attempts, and has a much better video – one which, most importantly, features Ed Tudor-Pole waltzing through it for no good reason. That’s before we even mention All Together Now (re-released in 2004), Back Home (1970 and sung by the team themselves, but still counts), or Carnaval de Paris. Yep, Dario G is English.

Tim: Great. So we’ve got another good one coming coming up?

Tom: Well, not quite. You know what England has a much longer history of? Dodgy football songs.

Tim: Oh.

Tom: To wit:

Tom: Chris Kamara is well known to football fans for being the comedy one out of the Sky Sports commentators. (That clip will explain the “missed red cards” references throughout the video.) Actually, let’s be fair. he does have a good set of pipes on him. And there have been much worse charity singles, and much worse football songs, than this.

Tim: True; there have been many better ones as well, as you just demonstrated. It’s…oh, it’s not terrible, I suppose, although the turning ‘England’ into ‘Engaland’ always gets me for some reason.

Tom: Wait, “gets you” in a good way or a bad way?

Tim: Oh, a bad way. A very very bad way.

Tom: It’s trying to be a bit 70s pub-rock, and it’s not doing badly. It’s a bit low-budget, but it’s competently produced, and while it won’t be going on my playlist I’ve got to give it the benefit of the doubt.

Tim: What? No you don’t. Not at all. If we can slag off the Children in Need single, we can certainly review this one honestly. Face it: it’s a bit crap. Not awful, especially as most football tunes go, but still beyond doubt.

Tom: What it’s missing is something that can be sung from the terraces. I don’t reckon that “na, na na na na na” is going to cut it: it’s difficult to come up with something catchy enough in the first place. Still: it’s a long way from being Gazza rapping.

Håkan Lidbo feat. Jessica Folcker & Cleo – Electric

Blimey, I’d have hated this last year.

Tim: Brace yourself, because if I heard this on the radio my initial instinct would be to throw the radio out of the window. It is, on first hearing, roughly as far out of our comfort zone as we could go short of ending up in Miss Trunchbull’s chokey.

Tom: Have you seen Matilda the Musical recently, by any chance?

Tim: It’s BRILLIANT. They make CHALK WRITE ON A BLACKBOARD.

Tom: Doesn’t all chalk do that? Oh, wait. On its own. Right.

Tom: Blimey, I’d have hated this last year. Dubstep – and all the associated electro genres that it’s dragged with it, ‘cos this sure as hell isn’t pure dubstep – has got its way into my head.

Tim: It first appeared as an interval act in a Melodifestivalen heat earlier this year, and was the point at which I realised I needed the loo. But on hearing this again three months later, my musical tastes have been mushed around enough that I actually like it. I know I said last week that I was bored of SUMMER ANTHEM CHOONS, but this is (currently) so far away from generic that I think it’s great.

Tom: I wouldn’t have counted it as an anthem until it goes to traditional four-on-the-floor at 1:45 – at which point I reckon I could dance to it.

Tim: Underneath the dubstep, every now and again you can hear echoes of the original Electric by Leila K from 1995 that this is a vague cover of (made slightly obvious by the somewhat misleading shout of ‘Leila K in the house’), and, well, that sounded quite ahead of its time back then, much as this sounds today. To be honest, I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of next year’s club tunes sounded like this. That’s not a bad thing, mind – as long as they’re not almost exactly like this.

Tom: I’ve got to admit, though: I don’t really like the track. I love the backing and the style, but the vocals and melody do nothing for me. Which is a shame, because there’s a great song in there waiting to come out.

Tim: Well, give it twelve months. By the way, I don’t suppose you can tell me which early-00s dance tune the backing not-drum bit that occasionally occurs, including 3:18-3:21, reminds me of, can you? It’s annoying me.

Tom: Not a clue, other than “generic dance tune”.

Tim: Fair enough.