Author: tom

Avicii – Penguin

This sort of stuff has been gone for too long. (With bonus classical diversion!)

Tim: I am glad that dance season is fast approaching, because this sort of stuff has been gone for too long.

Tim: This bloke ditched the ‘Avicii’ name briefly when he put out Bromance last year, but right now Tim Berg’s back as he was.

Tom: Speaking of which: do you have any idea how popular that track became? 38 million views for the official video, and I still hear it being played. Absolutely astounding track.

Tim: Well, now he’s dance-ing up a vaguely well known classical tune, the sort that gets requested daily on the Classic FM Drivetime show.

Tom: Now I do love tracks like this, if only because of my younger years when I spent far too long playing Dance Dance Revolution. I still know the step-rhythms for parts of “V (for EXTREME)” and the gorgeous “Kakumei” off by heart.

But if you really want to go back into history: then you have to start in the 1970s, with Walter Murphy’s “A Fifth of Beethoven” – which is, bizarrely, improved by the addition of Kanye West.

Tim: Why ‘Penguin’? Not a clue, but it does make for a nice picture.

Tom: Now that I can explain: the original piece is the modern classical “Perpetuum Mobile” by Penguin Cafe Orchestra, who also made the lovely “Music for a Found Harmonium” – which got turned into the execrable “Paddy’s Revenge” a few years back.

Tim: Ah – I knew the title of the track, just not the orchestra. And is it particularly execrable? I thought it was alright.

Anyway, I don’t really care what it’s called, because the tune is great. Good source material, excellent treatment of it, properly BANGING.

Tom: I was about to disagree with you, and then the track finally kicked in – at 2:20 – and I completely agree with you. After the beat drops, then yes; I like it. Like Bromance, though, I feel it does need a bit more.

Tim: Though having said I don’t care about the name, I am now tempted to mess around with it in GarageBand and stick some of this on top.

Tom: Get out.

Tim: I see. You probably wouldn’t have a problem with this, though.

Tom: …I’ll allow it.

Tim: You’re insane.

Beastie Boys – Make Some Noise

Old-school.

Tom: The Beastie Boys are so old-school that Tony Hawks parodied them. 23 years ago.

Tom: And this sounds like seriously old-school Beastie Boys. Decent sample, tight production, and the shouting, distorted multiple-guys-rapping style that no-one’s ever done quite as well since. Technically, it’s bloody excellent.

Which makes it a bit of a shame that I don’t actually like it.

Tim: Really? I think it’s good – lot of energy to bounce along to in your chair, which is always nice.

Tom: That sample grates after a while; even if some of the distortion’s thanks to YouTube compression it’s still a bit too much for me; and when it comes down to it my brain just thinks “it’s very nice, but I do wish they’d shout a bit less”.

Perhaps I’m getting old; perhaps I’m more used to modern production; but despite this being a fantastic record I just don’t want to listen to it. I think that’s my own fault, though.

Tim: It’s not something I’d put on my usual playlist, I suppose, but I’ve certainly got no aversion to it.

Owl City feat. Shawn Chrystopher – Alligator Sky

Oh. You’ve got yourself a rapper. Well, that’s just precious.

Tom: Ah, Owl City. Purveyor of cheap and tacky synthpop to teenagers across America. What do you have for us this time?

Tom: Oh. You’ve got yourself a rapper. Well, that’s just precious.

Still the exact same nonsense lyrics and happy-go-lucky electronic music. I suppose there’s nothing wrong with that, but once you’ve figured out the formula – and seen it expertly deconstructed – you kind of hope for more.

Tim: Thing is, I like Owl City. He’s a bit like the Scouting For Girls of the electro world – the songs all blend into each other, and as long as there’s one fairly decent one in there somewhere it all seems all right. This one’s alright – even the rapping is fairly low-key, so it doesn’t really disturb anything.

Tom: There are some artists that keep producing the same kind of thing, and that’s OK because it’s just so good; and there are artists who keep reinventing themselves, and that’s great too. And then there’s Owl City.

Still, at least there’s a key change.

Barbarellas – Night Mode

Tom: No, really, they’ve got a second single. I didn’t think it’d happen either.

Tom: It’s, um, well it’s pretty forgettable. And that autotune is really grating by a couple of minutes in: the song just never goes anywhere.

Tim: Except for in one ear and out of the other.

Tom: “If you want to be cool / take it back to school”? Bloody hell.

Tim: Well, that is at least better than the next bit, which cleverly rhymes ‘sexy’ with, um, ‘sexy’.

Tom: There is one good thing, though: the one with dark hair doesn’t look like Noel Fielding to me any more. But that’s only because I’ve now watched Blake’s Junction 7, and I now think she looks a bit like Mackenzie Crook in drag.

Tim: And there was me thinking you were going to apologise for before.

Tom: I realise that’s cruel, and I’m sorry. I’m well aware I’m not exactly the least androgynous person in the world. It shouldn’t have anything to do with the review, but I just can’t unsee it. It’s the sharply cut hair and worryingly slim body, I think. Yes. Sorry.

T-Pain feat. Chris Brown – Best Love Song

They just trade ‘ehh’ sounds back at each other for eight bars.

Tom: T-Pain: master of autotune whose best work is probably with the Lonely Island singing I’m On A Boat; and Chris Brown, noted domestic abuser?

Brace yourself, Tim. This isn’t going to be fun.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbYHmlto21M

Tom: I don’t know what’s more laughable about this.

Tim: Ooh, well let’s list things and see what comes out on top.

Tom: The parts where they just trade ‘ehh’ sounds back at each other for eight bars?

Tim: The fact that it starts with two rounds of ‘nappyboy’?

Tom: The ‘cowabunga’?

Tim: The autotune that’s so thick it’s possible they’re just saying stuff monotonously and letting the computer do all the work?

Tom: The key change, after which they trade ‘ehh’ sounds again before a bizarre guitar breakdown and drum solo finishes the whole thing off?

Tim: Oh, good lord – yeah, actually, that wins.

Tom: I just… I’m not sure I have words for this one.

Tim: In that case I propose just one: tripe. Although part of me is tempted to suggest a variant of Poe’s Law.

Natalia Kills – Mirrors

So what if she’s not the first person to do this sort of thing?

Tom: So here’s the first question, Tim: how many artists is she ripping o– er, “drawing inspiration from”?

Tom: I can hear the Eurythmics in there, plus Lady Gaga – obviously. Anyone else I’ve missed?

Tim: Hmm, I don’t know – there’s ‘ripping off’, but there’s also just ‘doing the same style as’ – as far as I’m concerned the music’s good, and so what if she’s not the first person to do this sort of thing?

Tom: It’s a pity that’s going to be the first thing anyone thinks when they hear this song, because it’s actually really quite good. It kept me listening throughout, and the production is note-perfect, as you’d expect.

Tim: Exactly – it could quite easily be a Lady Gaga track, and that should really be more of a compliment than a disparagement.

Tom: Bit of a disappointing bridge exit, but I can live with that because the guitar that comes in on that final chorus is just glorious.

A lot of people seem to be assuming that the lyric is “the mirror’s gonna fall tonight”, and it’s not – it’s “the mirror’s gonna fog tonight”. This is one of those rare pop songs that isn’t about love or romance: it’s entirely about how good the sex is going to be.

Tim: Also of note is the interesting approach to product placement in the video – shall we put effort into this, and think about how we can work someone wearing a pair of Monster Beats by Dre™ Studio White headphones into the video, or shall we just chuck them on a floor somewhere, cut to them once or twice and hope that’ll do?

Lauri – Heavy

Tom: A reader writes in to suggest this, saying: “the vocalist of The Rasmus decided to make it solo”. Now that was enough to interest me. Our reader continues: “I never preferred The Rasmus, or Lauri Ylönen with his voice, but this is something I just love!”

And you know what, I agree. Throughout the verses, you’re waiting for it to burst into something triumphant. The first chorus doesn’t quite manage that – but the song keeps building, with each section coming back just a little bit stronger. And after the bridge… well, then it’s just lovely.

Tim: It is, it really is. The only thing is that after every ‘heavy’ I sort of feel that it should be getting bigger, and leading up to something, even right at the end, but then there’s nothing it could really build up to. It’s still very good, though.

Tom: As for the cyborg one-man-band and his creepy sock puppet, though? I’ll leave that for you to mock.

Tim: Mock? Are you kidding me? I WANT THAT BABY THING AS A PET. After all, it needs someone to look after it now that its, well, mother, I suppose, is sadly gone. But I will treat it well, though, and it shall not need to dream of us having fun together; I will not require it to display some creative genius. I shall love it as I would my own child.

Until I get bored of it and put it in a cage somewhere.

Supermarket feat. Medina & Anders Bagge – Du Säger Du Älsker Mig

A nice pre-dance season dance tune.

Tim: Medina: famous Danish dance person. Anders Bagge: a Swedish musician who has previously been a judge on the Swedish version of Pop Idol, Idol. Supermarket: a band whom nobody seems to have heard of outside this track. Quite how they all ended up together I have no idea, but anyway: how do you feel about hearing a nice pre-dance season dance tune?

Tom: I’m glad it’s getting back to springtime: sunshine, flowers, and decent dance tracks.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_R7tZPe_0s

Tim: It’s fairly standard stuff, but it gets me going.

Tom: It really is standard, isn’t it? I got distracted about thirty seconds in, and only realised two minutes later that the track was still playing. My brain suddenly snapped back and I thought “oh, yeah, I’m supposed to be reviewing this”. So I suppose that’s my review.

Tim: I would posit that the distraction was partly aided by the foreign lyrics; I’d certainly prefer it if I knew what the lyrics were all about, but I can cope without that. The return out of the bridge is nice – nothing amazing, but satisfactory, and I think that sums up the song nicely. It’s a good club track, and should be more than capable of filling a dance floor. Do we need anything else for the summer?

Tom: In a couple of months’ time, hay fever medication.

Erik Hassle – Are You Leaving

Bloody hell, this is a long song.

Tim: Two minutes into this, I got bored. I looked at the time, and thought ‘bloody hell, this is a long song’. But I left it going, because it wasn’t exactly offensive, and then the second time it came round, the chorus suddenly really got me. Yes, it’s pretty much just one lyric repeated a lot, but there’s something about the way it’s sung that really brings out the desperation that’s meant to be there.

Tom: Hell of a chorus – and if he’s really made that video himself, about the town he grew up in, then excellent. I do wish he wasn’t constantly intercutting between two scenes though: it actually started to hurt my eyes after a while.

Tim: Still, four and a half minutes is a very long song.

Tom: While I’m happier than you to entertain songs longer than three and a bit minutes, I agree – it does go on a bit, particularly since the chorus contains uses the words ‘are you leaving’ approximately one million times. Pep it up a bit, Erik.

Tim: Any problems I have with long songs aren’t due to the length – they’re allowed to be long, provided they stay interesting throughout the time they take up.

Teddybears feat. Robyn – Cardiac Arrest

Isn’t it fun?

Tim: Set this to HD, put it full screen. Watch and listen.

Tim: Isn’t it fun?

Tom: What a waste of pixels. There’s no point putting something in 1080p HD if you’re going to put an 80s fuzz filter over the whole thing. And for a lyric video as well! It’s large text, people, you do not need high definition video for that.

Also, they misspelled ‘exorcist’.

Tim: You bastard, I’d not noticed that, and now you’ve ruined it for me. Anyway, tracks like this are why I love doing this site. It’s a song I would probably never have chosen to listen to – ‘who the hell are the Teddybears? Oh, it’s Robyn, it’s probably not great, I’ll give it a miss.’ – and yet I’ve listened to it and I’ve really enjoyed it. The strange blend of electropop in the verses and sort of rockishness in the chorus just seems to work so well.

Tom: I was all ready to write you a rebuttal, and then you went and wrote it for me —

Tim: I must admit I’m not so keen on the verses – the single lines repeated over and over gets old very quickly, and when it came back after the first round of ‘shake your bone maker’ I almost switched it off – but then the chorus seems brilliant, even if that isn’t much more inventive. It’s when they all merge together at the end, though, that it all just becomes brilliant. I love it.

Tom: Right. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I love it, but it’s a good track: it’s like reading a book where you have three entirely separate plot threads that only come together in the last few chapters – but when they do come together, everything fits together wonderfully. That last verse is worth it.