Europop – Page 90

Jasmine Kara – Beautiful World

“That feels like I’m watching someone’s terrible holiday video.”

Tim: This here by Swede Jasmine is a video intended to delight all; it will in fact annoy and delight in roughly equal measure, and I’m roughly 80% annoyed by it. Tom, you probably don’t want to watch this.

Tom: That feels like I’m watching someone’s terrible holiday video.

Tim: This is, I suppose, meant to be a happy song about making the world better, but my word is that an annoying video (filmed, would you believe it, entirely on Jasmine’s phone).

Tom: Oh. I am watching someone’s terrible holiday video.

Tim: There’s a whole load of bullshit in the YouTube description, about how everybody she asked how to make the world a better place answered “we need love”. Now, unless New York has changed enormously since I’ve been there, she’s telling massive lies about the number of people who told her to piss off, but never mind.

I’d like to stop focussing on the negative points of the video, like the OH SO ORIGINAL AND FUNNY ‘Free Hugs’ sign and the several times that John Lennon’s assassination crops up, because it’s a nice track, it really is. But, God, what an awful failure of a video, with the clip of the guy about to propose that cuts off as he gets to being on one knee, or the out of focus shots of people two feet in front of the camera.

Tom: And hey, if you’re going to stop people downloading it off YouTube, why not completely ruin the audio too?

Tim: “Everything we do, we do for love, and everything we see and feel comes from love.” Bloody hell.

Tom: It’s not a bad track, I guess — after a minute or so I just moved it to a background tab — but it’s a bit like candyfloss, all style no substance. I mean, it’s candyfloss sung by someone with a great voice, but… hm. That analogy got away from me.

Tim: Little bit. Never mind. Yes, the video’s a nice idea, but execute it properly, please, because the song is great, and I really really wish the video didn’t ruin it.

Sanna Neilsen – Undo

“Hell, this has the chance of Big Pop Success.”

Tim: As with last year, the viewers and international juries disagreed on who should win Melodifestivalen; unlike last year, the viewers’ choice won out, so by 212 points to Ace Wilder’s 210, this is Sweden’s Eurovision entry.

Tom: Crikey, that is close. I maintain that Melodifestivalen has one of the best all-round scoring systems, well, anyway. I’ll be interested to see what it beat.

Tim: Pfft. The somehow runaway favourite that can be safely described as a bit above average.

Tim: A risky option, perhaps, as it takes a good time to go anywhere, but man, when it finally impacts at the second chorus – what an entrance.

Tom: Taking a slow builder to Eurovision isn’t always a good strategy. It is, ultimately, a schlager track and that might not go down well — when was the last time we had a winner with a key change? —

Tim: I’m well aware that was rhetorical, but: Serbia, 2007, which actually came with two.

Tom: — but hell, this has the chance of Big Pop Success.

Tim: It’s possible that the initial verse/chorus didn’t quite resonate with everybody, and while it’s good, three minutes of it really just wouldn’t do at Eurovision, which leaves us with an unusual power ballad, really, almost completely changing direction. It’s much for the better, because the second and final choruses are just glorious.

Tom: It reminds me a bit of Little Mix’s “DNA”, actually: quiet start, big chorus number — they didn’t have the key change, though.

Tim: Far be it from me to suggest cynically that this song was built around the interminable recaps that permeate every live music competition, but blimey, show the viewers that immense return from the middle eight enough times and they’re sure as hell not going to forget this track.

Tom: Could we be going back to Malmö next year? Can the Swedish broadcaster afford it? I guess we’ll find out in a few weeks.

Tim: Two asides: interestingly (or not), this is the second time Sanna’s been the public favourite but not the juries’ – last time was 2008 against Charlotte Perrelli’s Hero, which ultimately won out. And speaking of Charlotte Perrelli, have a look at Saturday’s opening act. Not necessarily for the music, but mainly for the cameras flying around in the middle bit – WHAT AN ARENA.

Carina Perenkranz & Pernilla Parszyk – C’mon & Däns

“One of the best-sounding intros I’ve heard in a while. And then… good grief”

Tom: Oh crikey, that’s a dodgy title.

Tim: This song was initially accepted for this year’s Melodifestivalen, and allocated a slot in the final 32, but then got kicked out a few weeks beforehand because these two are, apparently, best known for being an advert. But here’s the song and, well, it’s basically utterly ludicrous.

Tim: So let’s split it into segments. Intro: very promising.

Tom: Heavens, yes. That’s one of the best-sounding intros I’ve heard in a while. And then… good grief.

Tim: Verse: awful. Pre-chorus: fairly awful. Middle-eight: fairly awful then very good.

Tom: I’m fairly sure I heard the words “Mick Jagger” in there somewhere.

Tim: I wouldn’t be remotely surprised. The chorus, though: utterly wonderful and so brilliant that I started laughing as soon as I heard it.

Tom: I wouldn’t go that far. It’s certainly a pretty good schlager chorus, but it doesn’t make up for the rest of it.

Tim: Not really, no. It’s certainly no loss to Melodifestivalen, though there are worse tracks in there so I suppose it might have been an improvement but actually if it had gone to Melodifestivalen this ridiculous video might not have surfaced, and that would have been a shame. Basically this song is half brilliant and half awful, and I’m really not sure which half takes it for me. Though I am tempted to chop out that chorus and set it as a ringtone for one particular group of my friends.

Tom: HANDS IN THE AIR, Tim. HANDS IN THE AIR.

Emmelie de Forest – Rainmaker

“Oh, they’ve gone for Fake African Chanting!”

Tim: In an apparent attempt to alienate the entirety of the south-west of Britain, the EBU have chosen to make this the official theme to this year’s Song Contest.

Tom: Oh, they’ve gone for Fake African Chanting! It’s like the mid-2000s never went away.

Tim: They certainly didn’t. She’s clearly happy staying true to the sound that won her the competition, or at the that’s the plan that the contest producers have anyway. It makes sense, after all – this is the sound that Europe officially declared their favourite, and it’s here in a song that has a lot of good bits in it.

Tom: Yep, despite my initial cynicism, this is pretty damn good – as you said, it’s a winning sound.

Tim: For a start, it has “join us” in it quite prominently (though it’s probably in the lyrics as #JoinUs), which is good for the branding and all that. It also has that lovely “make a rain” hook (sod the south-west) which has been going round in my head for quite some time now.

Tom: “Sod the South-West” being the original lyrics to NWA’s breakthrough hit, of course.

Tim: I can’t deny that the “weya”s get a bit tedious after a while, but that’s made up for by the rest of it. Well done producers, nice choice.

Satin Circus – Expectations

“Yes, it’s coming, almost there, HERE IT IS.”

Tim: Before we start, know that this is exactly the boyband sound I was complaining about recently.

Tom: The “exactly like One Direction” sound?

Tim: It is not something I will be complaining about today.

Tim: The reason I won’t be complaining is that it’s flipping brilliant.

Tom: Yep. And that’s because it sounds pretty much exactly like One Direction.

Tim: Yes, but almost an idealised One Direction. The lyrics, obviously, are of the standard tedious variety designed purely to appeal to every teenage girl out there, but it’s the music where it stands out. That chorus really is top notch – a fantastic vocal melody that’s remarkably catchy, instrumentation that doesn’t quite hit wall of sound levels but is certainly on the way.

Tom: To be fair, I think some of that is dodgy compression on the audio file: there’s a lot been crushed down there. It’s a cracking chorus either way, though.

Tim: One of my favourite parts is the great lead back into the chorus out of the quiet middle eight – there’s a sense of “yes, it’s coming, almost there, HERE IT IS”. This song has me drumming my fists on the table so much that my knuckles are somewhat sore now, and it takes a good song to do that.

Tom: You… you might want to consider gloves? I guess?

Tim: Wouldn’t get the same feeling. As mentioned previously, they claim to write all their own stuff and are of the “don’t call us a boyband” style of boyband; if they come up with this, though, I’m willing to do them that courtesy, or at the very least put them in the same elevated category of boyband as the likes of McFly – high praise, but much-deserved.

Tom: It’s a pretty good debut. It’s no “5 Colours”, but then that was very a much song from the last decade: this is a pretty damn good start.

Tim: The album’s out now everywhere (one of them’s written a pretty good blog post about the ‘everywhere’ bit and worldwide releases in general) and is full of this stuff, with only one dull ballad. Worth your money.

Sanna Neilsen – Rainbow

“When even the first verse can grab my attention, it’s a good song.”

Tim: Sanna Neilsen has a very good song in Melodifestivalen this year called Undo; in what I’m sure is no coincidence her upcoming EP is also called Undo, and this is one of the tracks from it.

Tom: It took me a second to realise that “Undo” is actually an English word meaning ‘to take back an action’, and not some Swedish word I didn’t know. I might be a bit tired.

Tim: Well, this’ll be fun.

Tim: I’m fairly sure this reminds me of quite a few very good tracks that are around at the moment/in the past couple of years (especially Halo, WHAT A TUNE), but not in any “hey you’ve nicked this” sense but more in a “hey this track is brilliant” sense.

Tom: It has some similarities, yes, but it’s not a ripoff by any means.

Tim: No, and suddenly I see what all the hype was about her Melodifestivalen entry, because it really is up there with the Demis and Kellys and, yes, Beyoncés of proper big pop ballads.

Tom: Agreed: when even the first verse can grab my attention, it’s a good song.

Tim: Right, though, I say ballad, is this a ballad? It sounds sing-y and emote-y enough to definitely be, but if we split power-pop into BALLADS and BANGERS it’s probably right on the dividing line.

Tom: And what a dividing line it is.

Tim: This track is basically incredible, and if you don’t like it you’re wrong. WRONG.

The Fooo – King of the Radio

“Here’s a new track without proper instruments.”

Tim: Just a few weeks after I got annoyed that boybands all sounded the same, here’s a new track without proper instruments.

Tom: That’s pretty good, actually, although I’m really not sure about those verses.

Tim: With synths, clapping and shouting, I like this a lot, even if it is a tad hubristic (albeit correct). Video’s fun, because let’s face we’ve all at some point thought it would be fun to dick about in a deserted subway station.

Tom: …wait, do you…

Tim: NO NOT IN A SEXUAL WAY. OR A MURDEROUS WAY. Just in a FUN WAY, with lots of perfectly timed choreography (though I can’t help wondering if their feet at some point developed an allergy to the floor). However, I don’t like that they only showed the first part of them sliding down the escalators, and not the last part that would have inevitably involved them faceplanting the floor at the end and destroying their trousers, not that that’s something I’d know anything about because I’ve definitely never done that because it would be naughty and embarrassing. Um. Where was I?

Tom: I think we should probably talk about the music.

Tim: Right. Song. Icona Pop shouting mixed with the occasional boyband “ooh-oo-ooh”, very enjoyable indeed.

For BDK – What I Must Find

“It’s quite the track, particularly that chorus.”

Tim: Another day, another awkward name but for entirely different reasons. BDK is Body, Drugs and Kicks, and that’s apparently what they’re doing this For. Anyway, we’ve met them before, though not explained the name, so there it is. And here’s the synthpop.

Tim: And this, I think, is a happy story of what happens when two people meet in a bar, as is the case with singer Adele (no) and producer Marcus.

Tom: Wait, what?

Tim: That is, apparently, what happened – met in a bar, got talking, decided to make music together. And what a lovely idea, much better than the typical “meet in a bar, hook up, try to forget about it the next morning” story. Which is very nice.

Tom: Well, that tells me more than I need to know about your time in bars. But yes – it’s quite the track, particularly that chorus.

Tim: The choruses here are frankly stunning. We complained last time that the song overran and that the verses were too long and disappointing to make up for the still very good chorus; here, it’s a sensible length, the verses are much improved (albeit still with room for more) and shorter and the chorus is that much better. All problems sorted, this track is superb.

Da Buzz – Can You Feel The Love

“Flood damage? I’ve got my SUMMER DANCE ON.”

Tim: Before you get your hopes up, this is not a danced-up version of the Lion King classic. Because that would have a Tonight on the end. Though it does have a Tonight in the lyrics. Oh, just have a listen.

Tom: That’s… well, it’s competent. It’s certainly not Elton, though.

Tim: Well, no. What it is instead is a (possibly three months too early) summer party banger that is absolutely and entirely what I feel like hearing right now, though I’m not sure I knew it. Rain? Flood damage? Transport chaos? Pah. I’ve got my SUMMER DANCE ON, and I’m forgetting about that, putting this on loud and having fun instead, dreaming of being up all night and in the Mediterranean. PARTY.

Tom: It certainly has that sort of association, but it’s a mid-set “keep the dance floor churning” track to me, something to be mixed into a big set, rather than a standout track on its own. There’s nothing wrong with it, but there’s nothing outstanding about it either — even that key change seemed a little prosaic, and that’s a bold thing to say about a key change.

Tim: Incidentally, if you did get your hopes up at the start and do want a danced-up version of the Lion King classic, you could do far worse than to hear this version by Harajuku. And please, do that. It’s wonderful. Or wonderfully awful. I don’t know which.

Tom: Ooh, bonus points for using Elton’s original lyrics, but Almighty Records’ version – it’s on Spotify – was obviously much better. In fact, just put that whole album on instead.

JTR – Ride

“What pretty much every boyband song has been ever since What Makes You Beautiful arrived”

Tim: What do you know, it’s a new boyband to fill the void left by The Wanted. Three brothers (John, Tom and Robin – clever name, right?), Sweden-born and Australian X Factor 2013 alumni. Fancy a listen?

Tim: And that is basically…well, what pretty much every boyband-with-instruments song has been ever since What Makes You Beautiful arrived.

Tom: Except this actually has the “useless record scratch” effect, last heard in Mmmbop. I’m not sure that’s a good thing.

Tim: It is possible that we’ve reached boyband saturation point? Synth-based The United aside, there’s really not much at all to distinguish between this lot, The Vamps, Lawson, The Fooo, Union J, Satin Circus, Youngblood and however many more; one notable exception there, because they’ve now ditched this and recently came out with a fair old racket.

There really is nothing new or original to be said about this song. (Actually, that sentence would work just as well without “to be said”.) It’s good to listen to, it could have come from any one of a number of bands, it’ll probably sell to a legion of fans calling themselves, I dunno, JTaRds? That’d work.

Tom: Oh dear. That’s not a good name, but I can see it sticking.

Tim: Meh. As you were.