Saturday Reject: David Axelrod – Horizon

“It just builds and builds and builds all the way until it shows that sometimes, democracy just isn’t the right solution.”

Tim: We had a run through of all of what would have been this year’s Eurovision entries last week, rating them out of 100, and if you recall, Tom, Ukraine’s was the only song of the lot that got single figures from all of us, what with it being (a) flute-based EDM with a howling vocalist and (b) not even interesting flute-based EDM with a howling vocalist.

Tom: Genuinely baffling.

Tim: What’s truly mystifying is that the voting public had the opportunity to choose this instead, and didn’t.

Tom: I was going to mock you here, Tim, and assume that you were sending it to me purely because of Well-Built Man With Shiny Hair. At least, I was for the first minute.

Tim: Well, yes, that would’t have been too unfair, as until 1:20, it’s possible it could be dismissed as a dull Eurovision ballad, and God knows that yes, there are enough of those that it might blend into the background; even what sounds like the chorus is a bit dull.

Tom: It was going to be the Eurovision of Dull Ballads, wasn’t it?

Tim: Given last year’s tedious victor, there was a risk, but oh boy is this not tedious. Because at that point, the proper chorus arrives, and we’ve actually got something, and he really shows off his voice towards the end of it. And then, even though we’ve only one verse and chorus, a sort of middle eight arrives, and OH MY DAYS with the smoke, and the backing singers, and is that a key change we have there as well? OH it’s just MARVELLOUS.

Tom: Full marks for him continuing to sing through what I’m fairly sure is a CO₂ blast to the face, as well. You’re right about all of that: it’s certainly better than what they sent. Not a winner, I’d guess, and it might well suffer from what got John Lundvik last time — the juries would like it, but the public would think it’s passé.

Tim: Oh, but it just so isn’t – it’s almost novel, differing from being a standard builder because it doesn’t have a second verse where it has to dip down a bit. Instead it just builds and builds and builds all the way until it shows that sometimes, democracy just isn’t the right solution.

Tom: Odd that he seemed to waver on that very last note — was that a technical decision, I wonder, or did he just miss it?

Moa Lignell – Born

“Good heavens, that’s a power-ballad instrumental intro, isn’t it? Haven’t heard anything like that for a while.”

Tim: “The song I wrote a year ago when I was sitting at home and longing for you all,” says Moa. Not sure what the circumstances were there, but she continues: “I wanted to launch the songs and be immeasurably happy with everything. I build up so many dreams and expectations that I can get an uncontrolled zeal in my body. I want to be who I was born to be. As simple as that. No frills.” No pressure, then.

Tom: Good heavens, that’s a power-ballad instrumental intro, isn’t it? Haven’t heard anything like that for a while. This sounds like a good Roxette track.

Tim: And that there is a song I absolutely love. The genre’s not really one I’d normally go in for – it’s almost a bit folk-y at times, and a bit slow – but here, everything sounds just wonderful.

Tom: It’s doing that trick of playing about with chord progressions, aiming for ‘anthemic’. And… I think it might actually be doing it?

Tim: The melody in the chorus is just lovely, the general sound is incredibly pleasing, with its lazy synth, slow drumbeat and strumming guitar, and the vocal is soft and flowing that I can just lie back and get lost in it, actually paying attention to the lyrics.

Tom: And an instrumental middle eight with an electric guitar solo in there, too. I think the last chorus could possibly have been given a bit more… something — but it makes up for it with that final line.

Tim: The thing that really made me know I liked it was when I thought “is this still going”, checked and saw that we were only two and a half minutes in, and found myself actually happy that there was still over a minute to go. Not sure that’s ever happened before, but it’s lovely that it has happened now.

Kiesza – Crave

“EXCITEMENT. Very important in a lyric video, that.”

Tom: I get grumpy at videos that start with photosensitive epilepsy warnings. They knew it was a problem — why didn’t they design the video to be safe from the start instead of just throwing a warning on and calling it a day?

Tim: Because EXCITEMENT. Very important in a lyric video, that.

Tom: Anyway, Kiesza is Canadian, has been going since the mid-oughts, and she’s back after two years off to recover from a car crash. And notably, this track has the same producers as Little Mix had for “Black Magic” and “Shout Out To My Ex”. Which means it should sound…

Tom: …like it came straight out of the 80s?

Tim: Hmm, yes, but also quite Shout Out To My Ex-y, there are recognisable similarities.

Tom: It’s good, don’t get me wrong! The production’s spot on, the vocals are great, the composition is… well, it’s okay, I guess, it’d maybe just scrape being a B-side for Carly Rae Jepsen. That came across as too harsh, but you know what I mean.

Tim: Yeah, I do – it’s no instant classic, though I think Jepsen B-side is way too mean – I can see this getting picked up for radio play. I’d say it’s okay.

Morgan Sulele & Måns Zelmerlöw – Gamle Dager

“Why is this a duet?”

Tim: Morgan, Norwegian, featured once: Måns, Sweden, featured 15 times. Here’s a duet from them, about the Old Days and past romances, with a fun behind the scenes video for anyone who doesn’t know how a recording studio works.

Tom: What a weird video. All in slow motion, some far-too-long lingering shots of objects to fill the time. It’s like they just had a camera op in for the day and they randomly pointed the camera at things.

Tim: The annoying thing about behind the scenes videos (and, as I’ve found recently during lockdown, director’s Blu-ray commentaries) is that so often they’re quite interesting here and there, but typically leave one or two things that you really want to know by the wayside.

For example, here: why is this a duet?

Tom: I’m going to guess “marketing”. I mean, it’s entirely possible that the two of them get along well, decided to record a duet, and picked this odd choice for it. But I think it’s probably marketing.

Tim: It doesn’t hurt the song in any way, mind – if anything, the vocal variety improves it a little – but it’s not really the sort of song that would normally have two singers. Sure, a guy and a girl might be singing in each others’ faces about how the old days were good/bad/horrific, as we see that fairly often, but two guys? This is entering boyband territory – not necessarily a bad thing, again, but, well, I just want to know why (and annoyingly, I can’t find any lyrics online to see if there’s a “two guys having a chat comparing old flames” narrative in the lyrics).

Tom: Sure. There’s nothing objectionable here, but I can’t remember a damn thing about it afterwards.

Tim: Fair, maybe. Listenable enough, though.

Charli XCX – Forever

“An experimental track doesn’t necessarily make a pleasant listen, though.”

Tom: Starting a track with distorted feedback is a brave choice in a world where people skip very, very quickly.

Tim: My first thought, immediate when I pressed play, was “oof, blimey”; that changed briefly to “oh, hmm” before going right back to blimey when that autotune kicked in properly. You’re not wrong.

Tom: In fact, I’d classify nearly all the synth pads in here as brave, particularly in the verse: the percussion that’s just a noise sample, the bass that sounds like it came from a really cheap 80s synthesiser. And the glitch samples on final chorus is… I mean, all I can think of is ‘brutal’.

Tim: Yeah – much as I’ve been a fan of Charli XCX previously, I’m struggling to find anything I like about this. The melody in the middle eight, perhaps?

Tom: But — and this is really strange for me to say — I don’t find it unpleasant at all.

Tim: Huh, okay.

Tom: It’s not like the producers are just dipping their toe into the water and giving one thing that could grate. The whole track is experimental enough (by pop music standards, at least) that I… I think I see what they were going for?

Tim: I guess, yeah, and I can agree with that – an experimental track doesn’t necessarily make a pleasant listen, though.

Tom: And if all else fails, there’s still a conventional pop vocal in there to hold on to as a lifebuoy.

Tim: Autotuned to hell and back.

Tom: It’s not going on my playlist any time soon, but I think I can see what they were going for. And I think I like it.

Tim: Nope, sorry – I’m out.

Steve Aoki feat. Icona Pop – I Love My Friends

“Well, that’s an interesting teamup.”

Tim: I’d never seen the video for Shanks & Bigfoot’s Sweet Like Chocolate until now, and it really is quite something. Anyway, that’s not why we’re here, we’re here for Steve Aoki’s new one, where he’s teamed up with the frequently reliable Icona Pop.

Tom: Well, that’s an interesting teamup: they’re both known for being Loud and Interesting.

Tim: And, yep, that’s very much a Steve Aoki feat. Icona Pop track. Slightly yelly vocals, hefty beat, no real melody in the verse but a decent (if not entirely original) melody in the chorus and breakdown. To be honest, it’s pretty much expected to hear when I pressed play, and that is no bad thing at all, for anyone who likes that sort of thing.

Tom: I’ve said this before, but: if you’re going to base your entire chorus on one repetitive melody line, then you’d better make sure it’s brilliant, and couldn’t possibly grate on the audience. I don’t think they’ve pulled it off here. Or at least, they haven’t for me.

Tim: Incidentally, both this and his last one with Backstreet Boys have an enormous number of writers – credited here we’ve got him, both of Icona Pop, Sigala, her off SHY Martin, and four other less recognisable names – and yet no-one thought to say “hang on, I recognise that melody”.

Tom: I do hear Shanks & Bigfoot in there now you point it out, but I’m also not convinced that it’s an original enough melody to even justify copyright: it’s more like something a small child would pick out on a piano.

Which, now I think of it, is just a different indictment of the songwriting. Ah well.

Saturday Reject: Drängarna – Piga & dräng

“It’s not being taken too seriously, no-one will mind if they go home empty handed, and pretty much everyone will have a smile on their face at the end of it.”

Tim: “Girl & boy”; dansband rock; through to Andra Chansen, knocked out by our previously-discussed Mendez. Think that’s all you need to know.

Tom: That’d not make it through the semi-finals, which is a shame, because it would make the grand final so much better.

Tim: Yep, we’re opening with a violin, we’ve an accordionist with an accordion that is very blatantly making no sound at all, we’ve guys throwing girls around like there’s no tomorrow, we’ve a key change going into the final string section and we close with a smashing of what is definitely an enormous pane of glass.

Tom: There is a lot that stands against this song: it’s not even three minutes but it feels a bit long; it’s incredibly outdated; and I couldn’t tell you what instrument or synth is making that boingy-spring sound, but I wish it wasn’t. But despite all that: I like it.

Tim: As exactly you should. I’ve said it before and I’ll probably end up saying it again: I love a song like this in a Eurovision competition. It’s not being taken too seriously, no-one will mind if they go home empty handed, and pretty much everyone will have a smile on their face at the end of it.

Tom: Right! This is the epitome of “go out there and have fun”, which — while it’s a noble goal — just isn’t what Sweden does at Eurovision.

Tim: Sure, I’d have preferred it if it’d have been Mendez with that trashy rap section that got knocked out, but we can’t have everything. At least we’ve got that key change.

Oh, and one final thing: the reason I first looked at this was that the band name rung a bell, though I couldn’t remember why. A quick search found the reason, which is the song Iskall öl & Captain Morgan, and if you don’t listen to that right now you’re really only doing yourself a disservice.

Thomas Gold – Live A Little Louder

“I think, frankly, this may have Raised Expectations Too High.”

Tom: The PR bumf for this one says that it “delivers a rich dose of inspiration just when listeners need it most”, which frankly sounds more like a marketing slogan for an energy drink, but sure.

Tim: We’ve seen worse.

Tom: “Don’t be surprised when you get goosebumps at the crescendo!”, continues the blurb. I think, frankly, this may have Raised Expectations Too High.

Tom: Because if they’d come in with “yep, it’s a by-the-numbers trying-to-be-anthemic dance track”, I’d have been all “you know what, this is actually a cut above”. Because that chorus is excellent: yes, it’s the same style we’ve heard for years, but I think it proves there’s still life in that genre.

Tim: Yes – I really really enjoyed that. I do question the marketing of it as relevant to lockdown when the main chorus line starts “come with me, let us live a little louder”, but marketing aside this is a great track. I particularly like that from a DJ I’ve never heard of before (even though he’s been going since 2009).

Tom: But goosebumps? Come on, mate. Tone it down a notch or two.

Tim: Not sure there’s any chance of that – his website describes him as “clubbing’s G-force of nature” and as “a household name in dance music” despite him not even having a Wikipedia page in his native Germany. Still, what’s wrong with a bit of self-confidence?

Dario G x Danny Dearden – If You Love Me

“I think I’m mostly impressed by the fact that Dario G has kept the same logo for almost a quarter of a century.”

Tim: It’s warm and sunny outside, but no-one can go out and party to enjoy it. It is, really, the perfect situation for relaxing summery tracks that Dario G is known for.

Tim: Ah. Hmm.

Tom: I think I’m mostly impressed by the fact that Dario G has kept the same logo for almost a quarter of a century.

Tim: Do you know, I entirely love it when acts do that. I can’t think of many off the top of my head – The Sound of Arrows have, and Busted have as well, though they dropped it for their first comeback album when they went all funky and less than ideal, which I think says it all.

And as for the music here, well, it’s good, don’t get me wrong – it’s just that right now, if I see Dario G come up, I’d like a song I can press play on and then relax to, in a garden, or on a balcony, or at just the right place where the sun shines through the window. What I really don’t want much of is a tropical beat-heavy banger that reminds me I could be having a massive night out. There’s still trademark parts in there, mind, and this is something that could absolutely be resolved with a remix: just take some of the drums off and I’m fairly sure I’d love it.

Tom: I’m not particularly against the style of this, it’s a good modern update to the old piano-dance.

Tim: Very very true, and I don’t want to come across too negative. This reaction is based entirely on my expectations, assumptions and personal wishes. If I’m out for a night in a club and this comes on, I’ll be putting down my piña colada and getting right on that dance floor. But I see Dario G, with the situation as it is…ahh, it’s just the timing.

Eric Saade – Glas

“It’s just okay, I guess!”

Tim: Over the years, Eric’s done brilliant songs, but also more than his fair share of awful songs, so I was a bit nervous when I pressed play on this.

Tom: It’s neither! It’s just okay, I guess!

Tim: First three notes, sing for life (and I can’t believe we’ve never featured that song), which is a happy start and the strings sound promising. Initial chorus backs that up. First verse…hmm…oh, but then the chorus comes back, it’s got more effort in it that previously and we’re right back on top.

Tom: I mean, “on top” is being a bit bold there, I think. I kept drifting into other tabs and being distracted by other things.

Tim: Second verse is fine because we know there’s better stuff coming. Given that, we’ve a 50-50 chance of the middle eight going well or not, and it turns out that…oh, it’s entirely average. Final chorus, good, entirely as expected. Taken as a whole, then, the song is basically entirely listenable, and better than I was worried it would be. You know, I’m reading that last sentence back, and it’s probably about as ‘damning with faint praise’ as it’s possible to get, isn’t it?

Tom: Whereas I just damned it with “meh”.

Tim: Oh, well.