It is a bit raunchy, isn’t it?
Tim: In the past twelve months Romania has already provided us with Stereo Love and Inna, and now at Europlop’s doors from Radikal Records* arrives this Romanian bloke, whose track Morena was released last September.
Tom: I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I agree with a YouTube commenter. Thank you to ‘vgasparis’, who simply says “This porn has nice background music.”
Tim: It is a bit raunchy, isn’t it? And the music is nice – repetitive but decent hook, good tune throughout the rest of it, consistent strong beat and added piano here and there. I like this.
Tom: Repetitive: yes. Decent: no. The verses don’t have a bad tune, I’ll give you that, but the rest really could use… well, anything.
Tim: Hence the lesbian storyline in the video, presumably, which is a surefire way to get most blokes on board, as the dribbling masses displayed in the club demonstrate. It’s all decent enough.
Not one of those tracks that takes a while to get going.
Tim: Basic Element, a Swedish dance group. This, a tune I present to you with one instruction: PUT YOUR HANDS UP.
Not in a bank robber way, mind. Like, in a dancey way. You know.
Tom: Blimey, that kicks off fast and strong, doesn’t it?
Tim: Yes – it really isn’t one of those tracks that takes a while to get going, which partly seems to be out of necessity. We all know I’m not one for a long track, but here, there’s just not enough time for everything to happen without getting crowded. It seems like a TV show where the producers want to make a episode that’s absolutely insane, with the viewers going OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD THAT’S HUGE, but they forget that they’ve only got so much time to do it in and it all comes out all a bit confused and there’s no time for anything to have any impact.*
Tom: My Eurobeat-loving roots mean that I should be absolutely OK with a dodgy Euro-rap bit in the middle of the track, but it just seems out of place here. You’re right about the track insanity, though: it’s not really genre-shifting at all, it’s just rather quick. That’s perhaps for the best – if they’d made it longer, I think it’d have gotten dull rather fast.
Tim: Here, obviously there shouldn’t be any time constraints, but it seems like a similar problem – they’ve tried to squeeze a five-minute track into 170 seconds, and it’s really just a mess.
Tom: An energetic mess, though.
Just get the damn album, it’s brilliant.
Tom: My Chemical Romance are one of the best bands performing in the world today. Who else does seriously good concept albums to enormous critical and popular appeal?
They’re still bringing out singles from the fantastic Danger Days, and with good justification. YouTube compression doesn’t do justice to the track, but nevertheless:
Tom: Listen to that, damn it. For a band that started as ’emo’ – even if they denied it themselves – they’ve basically become a modern glam rock band. And they’re good. How is that even possible? Just get the damn album, it’s brilliant and it’s only about a fiver now.
Tim: You know, there’s not much for me to add there.
We seem to have left Manboy far behind.
Tim: Don’t give up on this too soon.
Tim: Intro: dire. Verse: somewhat crap.
Tom: I rather liked the intro, but I’ll agree with you that the verse is terrible.
Tim: Chorus: good when it starts, heading for GREAT from the ‘why should I care what they say’ bit. But that’s all the positiveness I can really give this – it’s just nothing special. Unfortunately we seem to have left Manboy far behind, and that’s a big shame.
Tom: It’s just not got that sense of excitement about it – a lovely chorus like that shouldn’t sound like it’s being sung by rote.
Tim: Actually, scratch what I said about it not being special, because there’s the bridge. This s special, because it lures you in like an evil temptress, with a reworked second (a.k.a. best) half of the chorus, and then right as you’re gearing up for a great key change at 2:39 that will make this song alright, perhaps even downright good, it comes back. With a bloody awful rap bit. I had never heard of him before today, but right now I hate this J-Son bloke, for ruining our Eric.
Although I also hate him because it took me a good twenty minutes to realise his name is a play on Jason. Or at least I think it is, but then Jason isn’t actually his name – basically, it seems he chose a name that may or may not be a bad rewriting of something that isn’t his name but that took me too long to figure out even if it wasn’t there to figure out in the first place. I am entirely confused now, and hatred is all I have left.
Tom: Hey, it took me years to work out that “Flo Rida” was a pun on “Florida”.
Tim: True. Still can’t believe that.
Not quite a Eurobeat track, but it’s close.
Tom: All right, Example, you’ve done good before. Let’s see what your laid-back half-rapping half-singing brings us this time.
Tom: You know, that’s not quite a Eurobeat track, but it’s close – certainly the closest I’ve heard in mainstream music for a while, I think. I can see this, with minor differences – maybe a female vocalist – coming out of Germany a decade ago. I say that as a compliment – there’s a reason those styles still persist today.
Tim: A good time in music, was that. And speaking of which, I caught a bloke at work who’s normally all ‘hip-hop’s the one true way’ listening to Alice Deejay on his headphones the other day. Now I have leverage.
Tom: Interesting bridge, though; done entirely in the backing, with the pause and rising effect. Not sure it works, other than breaking up the song a bit; the ending does seem to just peter out after that.
Tim: I actually really like it – it’s more a variation on a theme than a standard bridge switch-out, and I think it works well.
Tom: It’d do well in the middle of a DJ set, this would.
The follow-up to her 2009 Eurovision hit.
Tim: Browsing through my iTunes library the other day, I discovered I have Ms Ernman’s La Voix du Nord album; contained within it is this, released as the follow-up to her 2009 Eurovision hit.
Tom: Ah, that explains why I haven’t heard it.
Tim: I like it a lot. It’s obviously not our traditional pop stuff, but it’s nice to have a change. It has a graceful intro, livened up by the drumbeat after a while. The first key change comes as an ‘ooh, that was pleasant’ surprise, and while the second is more predicatable it’s no less satisfying.
Tom: I’ll support pretty much any song with two key changes.
Tim: The title translates to ‘My Place on Earth’, and the lyrics seem to be all about finding peace and happiness and all that malarkey.
Tom: I found myself tuning out at first, and then starting to sit up straighter in my chair, and breathe a little deeper: it sounds almost like a patriotic song or a national anthem. I felt like saluting at that second key change.
Tim: Overall, this seems to have been a good second mainstream release – bridging the gap somewhat between her Eurovision act and her more usual style for anyone who wants to get to know her better.
Occasional puking noises.
Tom: Talented singer and actress Jennifer Lopez, collaborating with… well, with Lil Wayne. This is an example of a song that really didn’t need the collaboration.
Tom: A catchy-enough hook and reasonable verses, over which Lil Wayne makes occasional puking noises and repeats the last few words. He’s not bad when he actually gets into flow, but he just isn’t necessary on the rest of it.
Tim: Hmm. Her last track was entirely ruined by the addition of Pitbull; Lil Wayne’s not so bad, but you’re right – he really wouldn’t be missed.
Tom: And what on earth is with that bridge? It’s as if someone suddenly spliced in an entirely different song for a little while. Everything changes, with no connection between the two. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anything like that before – I’m almost convinced it was put in just to screw up the folks who watch it on YouTube, but it’s too melodic for that.
Tim: Interesting, certainly – I have no problem with it though, as it does liven up an otherwise somewhat dull song.
Tom: If there’s a version without the interruptions from bridge and Wayne, then I could support it. As it is – not so much.
“Oh, this upsets me. The Saturdays used to be good.”
Tom: It’s hard to believe, but this is even more highly processed and stylised than a regular Saturdays track.
Tim: Oh, this upsets me. The Saturdays used to be good. Oh…
Tom: Is there a single lyric in there that actually sounds like it was originally sung? They might as well have just synthesised all the audio and got Weta Digital to generate some CGI women to sing it.
Tim: Yeah – I am actually genuinely gutted by this. They were never the most ground-breaking of groups, but the music wasn’t this tedious or dull before.
Tom: And the video’s even more stylised: they’re walking in step like some kind of bizarre stiletto-based army. I’m not sure what’s less believable: product placement for lip gloss, or their track being on actual vinyl.
Tim: There are, however, a lot of blokes who would give a lot to be trapped in that lift with all of them.
Tom: Well, granted. The trouble is, of course, that the song’s is catchy – just like it’s calculated to be. After a couple of listens, this has all the requirements to be a floorfiller, even if it’s rather difficult to sing along to.
Tim: Is it catchy, though? Maybe I’m having an off day, but I’ve listened to it twice now and I still can’t really pick out a chorus.
Tom: Sorry, what? I was still distracted by that lift.