Evanescence – What You Want

Screw you, society! I’m not part of your system!

Tom: Wait, they’re still going?

Tom: Apparently back after a “hiatus”, still with the same lead singer, and still with that early-2000s shouty feeling to them.

Tim: To me, it sort of seems ‘same old, same old’, but that’s absolutely not a bad thing. I liked them back then. Therefore, I like this.

Tom: I feel a bit like I’m 16 again, listening to this and… well, actually I didn’t have much of a rebellious phase, but I feel like I should start to have one now. Screw you, society! I’m not part of your system!

Tim: Oh please don’t – you’re only embarrassing yourself, you know.

Tom: Can you have a mid-life crisis in your twenties? Anyway – after the track finished, I found that I couldn’t remember the lyrics, and I couldn’t remember the tune – but I do remember the feeling that goes with it, and I rather like it.

Tim: Likewise. Good stuff.

Saturday Flashback: Secret Service – Ten O’Clock Postman

I can only describe that beat as righteous.

Tim: I saw this shared on Twitter recently; until then I had never heard of them, but I think this is most definitely worth a mention, because it’s fun.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMRzgyLY3c0

Tom: Some old school disco! I’ve not heard it before, but I can only describe that beat as righteous.

Tim: First, the song: I think it’s lovely that this bad wrote a song dedicated to a postman.

Tom: The Carpenters did the same thing, but with significantly less funk.

Tim: Second, the band: well, according to their biography on Spotify, these guys (from Sweden in the early 1980s, incidentally) have quite a distinguished background – they wrote a few Melodifestivalen entries, though nothing that won, then decided to go into the singing business. Multiple Europe-wide hits, including their first release, 1979’s Oh Susie, this one from 1980, and their biggest hit, 1982’s Flash in the Night.

They split in 1987 and the lead singer, Ola Håkansson, became part of a song writing team known as Norell Oson Bard, who then wrote all sorts of songs. (‘Bard’, by the way, is the same Alexander Bard who would later be in BWO and Gravitonas.)

Tom: And so it all becomes interconnected. If you have that urge to write music, then a band breaking up won’t stop you – you’ll just form a new one.

Tim: Absolutely. And that, children, is this weekend’s musical education and message. Wasn’t it fun?

Maria Mena – Homeless

“Now oh my word, do I have an issue with this.”

Tim: Just released a new album, this lady has. Let’s have a lead single, shall we?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zXGLS5yrVjI

Tim: Now oh my word, do I have an issue with this.

Tom: Ooh. I’ll batten down the hatches, then.

Tim: Because let’s be honest, it’s not the most inspiring song ever. Sure, it’s light, and it bounces along gently, but it’s not going to get anyone excited, is it? OR IS IT? Because from 1:30 we begin what is most definitely a warm up to something. The quiet drums are kicking in, the strings repeating themselves over and over, gradually going for something.

Tom: It’s a build. A slow build. It’s got to be leading to something.

Tim: Hasn’t it just? And then comes a moment of silence – wow, this is going to be big – then come the snare drums – OH GOD IT’S HUGE – then just WHAT. What was that. I’ll tell you: it was 30 seconds – THIRTY SECONDS – of buildup to ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Tom: Musical blueballs, Tim.

Tim: I first heard of you five minutes ago, Maria Mena, but now I hate you. I BLOODY DESPISE YOU.

Tom: I think we may just listen to too many europop tracks; the cues we expect don’t always apply here.

Tim: Oh this isn’t europop expectations, this is just rules of LIFE. You don’t do that, ever. YOU JUST DON’T.

Erik Segerstedt – Break The Silence

Predictable, somewhat dull, and guaranteed to make you like it.

Tim: A former bandmate of Danny from EMD has gone back to doing solo stuff; he’s also gone back to doing songs of Pop Idol winners. Formerly it was his own; now it’s a cover of South Africa’s Jason Hartman, from 2009.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0bi-bRDmjQ

Tim: You can tell it’s a winner’s song, can’t you?

Tom: If I had a lighter, it’d be in the air.

Tim: Absolutely – the happy key, the increase in emotion towards the end – all adds up to something formulaic, entirely predictable, somewhat dull, and guaranteed to make you like it. Because that’s what these songs do.

I have no real trouble with this, mind, but for your first release as a returned-solo artist, why cover this?

Tom: Most people in his home country won’t have heard it; and if it’s already been picked as a winner’s song it’s reasonably bankable.

Tim: Yes, I suppose on some levels it’s appropriate, but it’s also boring (and almost identical to the original). Give us something good.

Tom: Oh, he’s already managed that. Something new, now that’d be worth a listen.

Elodie – Go Away

A video that’s returned all the way to the 1980s.

Tim: Yesterday I demanded a return to sensible videos; here we have a video that’s returned all the way to the 1980s.

Tom: I’m not sure that makes it ‘sensible’.

Tom: Interesting. I wonder whether it was actually filmed with 1980s tech, or whether it’s been carefully recreated with modern computers? The fancy backgrounds suggest the latter for at least part of it, but it’s hard to get that proper ‘fringing’ effect without actually pointing a camera at a monitor.

Tim: And let’s be honest, the music wouldn’t sound out of place 25 years ago either, really.

Tom: Ah, now that’s where I disagree with you. There’s a lot of newer dance stuff in there, although I’ll admit it’s not the most exciting of tracks. You’d expect a bit more from a final chorus, wouldn’t you?

Tim: You would. Ending is remarkably abrupt, which came as a bit disconcerting.

Tom: Perhaps, but I did realise why you got the 80s vibe from – that last bit sounds like the drum bit from Blue Monday.

Anna Abreu – Stereo

Lesbian antics, dancing and gambling nuns.

Tim: Last time we met, if I remember correctly, you asked of me, “Tim, why aren’t there more Swedish music videos featuring a combination of lesbian antics, dancing and gambling nuns.”

Tom: You don’t remember correctly – but I do enjoy all those things, so I’ll run with it.

Tim: Really? You couldn’t just have said, “Why yes, Tim, I did. Why do you think it is?” Anyway, it seems Anna Abreu is here to answer the question you didn’t ask: because they’d all be bloody weird.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMQT5B3quto

Tim: I mean really, what is going on here. This is all getting a bit ridiculous, isn’t it. Anyway, music, I suppose, is all dancy and fun.

Tom: There’s a bit of Pet Shop Boys influence in there, I think – although that might just be the bell sample reminding me of some track of theirs.

Tim: Yeah, well maybe, but I really can’t focus much on the music what with that video still in my head. What on earth, please, was going through the mind of whoever came up with that?

Tom: I don’t know, but I’m trying to work out a “bad habit” pun now. You know? Habits? They’re what nuns wear.

Tim: Yes, they are. And?

Tom: Oh, suit yourself.

Tim: The lyrics are basically her ranting to an ex-lover about how he crushed her and tore her soul to shreds and all that usual rubbish, but here we’ve got her singing and dancing like there’s not a trouble in the world.

Tom: Which I’m not sure that chorus really deserves. It does go on a bit, doesn’t it?

Tim: Bloody silly, it really is. I demand a return to sensible videos.

Pandora feat. Stacy – Why – Magistral

Fantastic electronic backing.

Tim: Pandora: A Swedish lady off the 90s, whose song ‘Why’ had a chorus being used here. (See? I do know some old stuff.)

Stacy: A Latvian person taking that song, stripping out pretty much everything but said chorus’s vocals and adding her own stuff.

Tim: ‘Her own stuff’ here being the fantastic electronic backing, the foreign singing after the choruses and the foreign rapping.

Tom: “Foreign”? Oddly, it seems to have a bit of a Lonely Island vibe to it to me – something in the cadence, I think.

Tim: Two out of those three things are great; the less said about that latter one the better, I think.

Tom: That is some lovely synth work on the backing, isn’t it? After the track gets rid of the Twilight Zone pretentions at the start, it’s really rather listenable. But yes, pity about the rapping.

Tim: Video’s interesting; I like to imagine a conversation. “Hey, Pandora? Got this Latvian bird on the phone, says she wants to use your song.” “Yeah, sure, but only if I get to play some sort of religious omniscient goddess in the video.” “Erm, hang on…yeah, she says that’s fine.” “Sorted. But I warn you, if I don’t get some fucking MASSIVE wings, I’ll throw a serious hissy fit. Oh, and I want monks dressed in binbags as well.”

Tom: Wow. It’s like I’m in the room when that happened.

Saturday Flashback: The Feeling – A Hundred Sinners

How about something joyful from a couple of months back?

Tom: How about something joyful from a couple of months back?

Tim: My first thought comes directly from the nerdy part of me that’s into typography: I feel a bit sorry for Anna, lumbered with a monospaced font while the others all get fancy writing.

Tom: Blimey, I’m a typography geek and I didn’t even spot that. Anyway: The Feeling. Purveyors of jaunty bubblegum tunes that wouldn’t even count as ‘indie’ if they were a more well-known band. And what a jaunty tune this is.

Tim: Jaunty is an excellent and sadly underused word. And appropriate for describing this song.

Tom: “We threw a party. It was a lot of fun. We should do it again.”

Tim: Ah, see that’s wrong. It’s sad, it really is, but one of the immutable laws of the universe is that any attempt to emulate a previously good night will never ever be as good.

Tom: Regression toward the mean. An important concept.

Tim: Ooh, Education. Children, I want you all to go and study that, as you may be tested on it later.

Done? Good. Relating it to this situation – the original party is already being built to be better than it was (amazing though it may well have been), and it just won’t live up to the promises – at least some of the best people won’t be there, the atmosphere won’t be quite the same, and worst of all, the highlights won’t be spontaneous, and therefore not as fun. Sorry.

Tom: Ah, but the chorus is “should’ve been there, should’ve been there”. Which is odd, because the rest of the song is in… huh. Actually, I’m not sure what tense it’s in. It’s all over the place. Can we stop over-analysing this, please? It’s too lovely for that.

There’s nothing deep to this track, and I don’t mind that one bit. In fact, it’s a pop song that isn’t about love or relationships – and that’s a rare thing indeed.

Tim: Yes. And despite my views on the song’s philosophy, it’s still good fun to listen to.

Agnes – Don’t Go Breaking My Heart

“Not sure about the verses, but that chorus isn’t half bad.”

Tim: She’s back with a fourth album soon, and much as I’m sure you’d like it to be, no, this first single is not a cover.

Tom: You know me too well. Although it’s an odd decision to use the same name as an Elton classic, surely?

Tim: This is good. Much better, I would go so far as to propose, than Release Me, although I never really got that – always seemed a bit too slow and non-eventful, and I much preferred On and On, which was sadly somewhat overlooked in the UK.

Tom: It takes time to kick in, but it’s worth it in the end. Not sure about the verses, but that chorus isn’t half bad.

Tim: Back to the matter in hand, though, I find the chorus somewhat disturbing: for some reason, probably the, I don’t know, whatever it is, I find myself actually wanting to break her heart. It’s sort of that the pumping-ness of it makes me want to do something, and she’s there singing at me, all about breaking her heart. So what if she doesn’t want me to do it? I want to do something, and she’s given me an idea.

Tom: I’m got an idea for a song. It’s called “Don’t Poke Yourself In The Eye”, and it’s got a banging chorus. What do you think?

Tim: Um… actually, you know what? Go ahead and record it – I’m sure I’ll enjoy hearing it more than enough to compensate. We can even review it on here.

I’m not really sure about this introduction – the dubstep style of it isn’t remotely related to the rest of the song, and it almost seems as if it’s been put there just to lure people in. It seems a bit of a cheap trick, though if it works I reckon it’ll have been worth it.

I really have that Elton John track in my head now.

Tom: So do I.

Sugababes – Freedom

It does take a bit too long to get going.

Tom: Is this a comeback attempt, or have they just slipped off my radar lately?

Tom: The first part of this seems to go nowhere until that synth line kicks in, and then… well, it’s like an old Sugababes album took a few downers and decided to take a rest for a while. And then – just to kick it while it’s down – a dubstep middle eight arrives in an attempt to break up any dancability.

Tim: I don’t mind the dubstep bit, but you’re right that it does take a bit too long to get going.

Tom: Timothy Jeffries! You “don’t mind” the dubstep bit? What happened to your railing against all things dubstep? I remember you calling me out when I said I didn’t mind a dubstep track a while ago.

Tim: Well, as the somewhat disappointing early breakfast fill-in DJ on Radio 1 said when I was half-asleep this morning whilst defending her record of the week (the execrable Nero reworking of The Jets’ Crush on You), “it works it way in, and that’s what dubstep does.” (She did, however, then go on to play What Makes You Beautiful, so she’s somewhat forgiven.)

Tom: It’s got the same vibe as ‘About You Now’, only much slower.

Tim: Much slower, to the extent that it’s, unfortunately, not remotely in the same league.

Tom: Can you imagine a dancefloor bouncing to this? The last chorus almost recovers to ‘enthusiastic’, but it’s not quite there.