Eurotix – Kiss Them For Me


Tim: Okay, this is an odd one. Sent in by Stefan, who directed the video, it’s a synth-driven pop song written from the point-of-view of Princess Diana.

Tom: What.

Tim: Now, we’ve talked about these guys a couple of times before, and the verdict was: music initially dull but improving, videos of a terrible first-year art-school quality.

Tom: Let’s get the bad out of the way first: that’s still a terrible video. Sorry, Stefan. “No one will ever be able to say that we take ourselves too seriously,” says the description, but that’s exactly what I’m saying: it still looks like an over-enthusiastic first year at art school.

Tim: Well my thought on reading that description was simply “…or indeed that we are anything other than batshit crazy.” I mean REALLY, COME ON. You’re singing from the perspective of a posthumous Princess Diana? ARE YOU ON GLUE??

Tom: Well, yes, there is that. Visually, they’ve shot for the moon and missed, and that means it looks really unprofessional. From a ‘selling records’ perspective they’d have been better off just sticking some static album art over the track.

But the music! It continues to improve: there’s some really nice composition here, good work on the synths, and a lovely middle eight.

Tim: Music, sure, it’s good, BUT THE LYRICS! HOW ARE YOU NOT TALKING ABOUT THE LYRICS. They are singing from the perspective of A POSTHUMOUS PRINCESS DIANA – yes, I’ve repeated that from just a few lines ago, but HOW IS THAT NOT THE MAIN THING YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT TOM?

Tom: Because they all sort of just washed over my head. The song could stand to be a minute shorter; it could stand using some sounds that were invented after the 1980s; it could stand to not have that video. But it’s not bad.


Tom: I feel like we’re watching someone develop their composing and production skills, and it keeps getting a bit better each time.

Tim: And I feel like we’re watching someone slowly inching themselves towards being committed to a psych ward.

Eurotix – He’ll Be Home For Christmas

“Oh, that intro got me RIGHT EXCITED.”

Tom: We’ve covered this Swedish Italo-disco project a couple of times before, generally because they email us their songs, which is always nice.

Previously, we’ve said: their videos are dodgy, their sound is good, but they tend to go on a bit longer than they need to. Well, BRACE YOURSELF…

Tim: Ooh?


Tim: Oh.

Tim: Oh, that intro got me RIGHT EXCITED.

Tom: Sometimes, it’s okay to just put some snow and some tastefully-kerned words on screen. This is one of those times. I feel a little guilty saying that, since it’s the video editor that sent this in to us — but it’s the kind of video that inspires a “mate, maybe not?” reaction.

Tim: I pushed play and switched to a different tab; on reading that I switched back and saw the blue wonky-eyed reindeer spinning through space. Fairly sure the people in the next building heard my laugh. I LOVE IT. My reaction is “mate, DEFINITELY,” although admittedly the relationship being represented by various penguin images doesn’t make much sense.

Tom: As for the music: they’ve reached into the Big Bag of Christmas Europop Clichés, picked out as many things as could fit in their hands, and bunged them all into a track. The result is surprisingly good, actually.

Tim: It’s very, very good. I’m trying not to giggle at “Now he’s on his way to me/in time to trim my Christmas tree,” because it probably isn’t meant as an innuendo, but I think we’ve found my level of maturity.

Tom: Sure, we’ve heard everything here before, but I can see this padding out one of those bulging 4-CD “Complete Christmas” compilations. It’s not a classic, but it’s… well, it’s nice. And it could be so much worse.

Tim: That’s an interesting album – the sort of one where you can listen to thirty seconds of each track and enjoy it, but then desperately need to skip to the next one. If you’re browsing Spotify for Christmas re-interpretations, though, have The Green Days of Christmas.

Eurotix – Life As It Slips Away

“Sound the awkward first year film student video klaxon!”

Tom: We occasionally get anonymous entries to our little submissions box, and this is one of them. The comment with it just said “retro 80s”.

Tom: Sound the awkward first year film student video klaxon! I hope that’s a deliberate dodgy-80s video aesthetic. For a track that’s so well produced, they’d have been better off just making a simple lyric video than that odd mix of badly-framed, wobbly camcorder shots.

Tim: Hmm. It is a little odd, although some of the pointless shots of, for example, the river flowing under the ice, do remind me of crappy videos from the 1980s, so that may have been a target.

Tom: Oddly, all it would take is a fancy camera and some depth of field and that’d probably be a brilliantly arty video. Unfortunately, it… isn’t.

So listen without the video: how’s the track? Well, it sounds like an album track from the 80s. Not a bad thing, I guess, and that chorus melody is actually damn catchy even though the vocals probably wouldn’t get any chairs spinning on The Voice.

Tim: I really like it, and it doesn’t leave me with the same feeling that their last one did, that it needed more variation. As such, a marked improvement.

Eurotix – I Plead Insanity

‘A slight “you could’ve varied that bit, maybe?” feeling.’

Tim: Says the e-mail, “We’re an 80’s retro synthpop/italo disco project from Sweden.” Succinct, you’ll agree, but also accurate.

Tom: Very accurate. Have you noticed how there aren’t many 90s retro acts? The 80s had a sound all to itself, whereas the 90s were more a prototype for the pop we still have around today.

Tim: Very true, and this song really does emulate that sound well – a while back I bought a Ministry of Sound Electric 80s compilation, and this could easily be one of the lead tracks on it. Is it good for that? Yes, it is, and it also comes with hints of BWO in there which is always pleasant.

Tom: I agree with all that, although at four minutes it does seem to outstay its welcome a bit.

Tim: You’re right, and I think that’s because while that hook is memorable and easy to grasp, it does mean that I’m left with a slight “you could’ve varied that bit, maybe?” feeling. Still, it’s a decent hook, the production’s very good and we can’t ask for a whole lot more. Maybe just a little less.