Tom: Help me, Tim. I’m appreciating dubstep.
Tom: I heard this on Zane Lowe’s Radio 1 show last week, and… well, I can’t explain it.
Tim: Well, I’m a minute and twenty seconds in and so far I think it’s gr- oh, hang on.
Tom: I thought I couldn’t stand dubstep – but somehow, as it’s started to cross over into the mainstream, it’s wormed its way into my head. It’s started to mutate into this kind of pop-dubstep thing that maintains that bass wub wub wub while not completely alienating the public at large.
Tim: Well, the standard dance stuff that’s more than a tad reminiscent of Pjanoo is okay – but those two sections where it all breaks down are just, well, pretty dire.
Tom: Yes, a couple of those wub wub wubs are absolutely ridiculous (the ones that sound like Elmer Fudd stuttering), but setting those aside it’s somehow listenable.
Tim: Okay, main question: what have you done with my Tom Scott? And what are you demanding for his return? I’ll go up to fifty pence, but after that you can keep him.
Tom: What’s wrong with me?
Tim: I don’t know, but I might me persuaded to go up to sixty if you only torture him a little bit.