Zara Larsson – Rooftop

“She rhymed ‘crazy’ with ‘crazy’.”

Tom: Our regular correspondent, CB, sends this in with the note that it’s got “somewhat cringeworthy lyrics”. CB’s not wrong.

Tim: Oh, SO WRONG – those lyrics are perfect.

Tom: She rhymed “crazy” with “crazy”. Fairly sure these lyrics were actually written by a ten-year-old.

Tim: EXACTLY. Glad we brought this up, because remember Carry You Home? Lyrics included “I’ve been through the days when bright love turns into hate” and “You lose the way and you hit the wall, I’ll be the one to carry you home”, and I’ve got to say, as I meant to say then: bullshit. THOSE are the cringeworthy lyrics, because she’s 16. SIXTEEN. She has not been through those days, and she is not remotely in a position to carry someone emotionally when they’ve been through shit. She is ENTIRELY in a position, though, to dream up a perfect future life based on getting off with one guy at a party.

Tom: I should really dislike this song — not just for the lyrics, for the fact it outstays its welcome, and that it basically epitomises my regular complaints about ‘monotony’. But I can’t, and it’s because of the production. The synth lines in the background are brilliant, the melody works well, and it manages — and this is a hell of a compliment — to sound almost like it’s off Beyoncé’s new album.

Tim: Hmm. I’d say a Jessie J album, and it would sit in the same position in my iTunes library – just about made its way there off a Now compilation, and probably skipped over whenever it came up.

Tom: Apart from those lyrics. If they’d used a different lyricist, this could have been a brilliant track. As it is: well, I’ll hope for an instrumental.

Tim: And I’d take an a capella version. Shall we split it?