Frankie Cocozza – Embrace

It’s TIME. To FACE. The GLOTTAL STOPS.

Tom: Frankie! Cocozza!

Tim: Total bellend, excellent Peter Dickson name.

Tom: You know how some musicians dull down their accent when they’re singing? Yeah, he’s not done that. It’s TIME. To FACE. The GLOTTAL STOPS.

Tim: That is not remotely what I thought it would be. Voice aside, which is like a male Kate Nash on steroids, I actually like it.

Tom: You know, despite not particularly liking the personality that showed on the X Factor – or that accent – I don’t really mind this song. I find it difficult to get any particular opinion worked up about it: it’s pleasant enough, seems to vaguely remind me of a half-dozen other slow songs, and would slip into the background of Heart Radio quite easily.

Tim: Yeah – a good enough description. And I’m even willing to forgive him that haircut, which somehow doesn’t look as terrible as you think it would.

Tom: But what’s with that outro? Those last few seconds sound like the generic ending of a sitcom theme tune – I’m half expecting a BBC copyright notice to scroll along the bottom of the video.

Tim: Haha – starring Frankie as the total knob whose trademark LOLs are all swearing on primetime TV ‘accidentally’. Oh, such funniness.

Avril Lavigne – Here’s To Never Growing Up

“This could have been a lower-key song off any of her earlier albums.”

Tim: Apparently, the kids today are all into Radiohead. Who knew?

Tim: Actually, that’s an entirely unfair way of looking at it; given that this was written by Avril herself (with Nickelback’s own Chad Kroeger).

Tom: Ah, Nickelback, the music industry’s punchline.

Tim: If we take this at a slightly deeper level it’s actually probably a sort of autobiographical song. A decade or so ago when she first started out, Radiohead were at the peak of their popularity in the US so really it’s a song about her being a Peter Pan sort of person.

Tom: And certainly, her music doesn’t seem to have changed all that much since then: this could, I think, have been a lower-key song off any of her earlier albums.

Tim: It’s not really a song aimed at teenagers, but instead at people her age. My age. Your age, if it’s not too late for that. Basically, the people that want to be kids forever. The people that don’t want a maturing pop sound but are instead as happy as they ever were with Avril Lavigne’s pleasant but somewhat shouty, pop output.

Tom: That’s certainly a pretty big audience.

Tim: Of course, teenagers could take a lesson from it – she’s 28 now, but she doesn’t want to let go (HA! Let Go.) of her youth.

Tom: I see what you did there.

Tim: Cheers – good, wasn’t it? Maybe she missed it while she had the chance, maybe she’s warning those damn kids to make the most of their childhood and adolescence while they can. Either way, I think this is far more analysis than I’ve ever given to any song before, maybe because it almost speaks to me directly.

It’s a flawed concept, obviously – we all have to grow up, and there’s perhaps a sense of desperation in the “won’t you say forever, if you stay forever we can stay forever young” – but’s a nice idea, and one I can try my hardest to cling to in the face of the gradually dawning reality that is my disappointingly unfulfilled life.

Tom: Wow. That got dark fast.

Tim: Yeah, it did, didn’t it? Damn it, I was in a really good mood when I started writing this. Sorry, everybody. This is basically a perfect example of why pop music should never ever meet real life.

Tom: So in summary: standard Avril Lavigne track, except it makes you feel a sense of existential dread. Fair enough.

Saturday Reject: Swedish House Wives – On Top Of The World

“That’s a hell of a chorus.”

Tim: Where to go this week…ooh, let’s try Sweden. Sixth place, heat two of Melodifestivalen.

Tom: Ha! Swedish House Wives. I get it. That’s quite clever.

Tom: Oh, that’s a hell of a chorus.

Tim: Isn’t it just? So my question: sixth place! Why, sixth place? I mean, COME ON SWEDEN. What are you doing?

Tom: Listening to the versus?

Tim: Well, yes, alright. Admittedly, this song wasn’t as good as it should have been – after all, a group called Swedish House Wives clearly has the potential to be absolutely amazing, especially when you give them a song called On Top Of The World, and I’ll happily admit this wasn’t that. The verses are disappointing with a fairly generic backing and not much inspiration to them, but there’s still a great chorus.

Tom: That’s just not enough though – not for Melodifestivalen. It’s got to be perfect. Loreen-perfect.

Tim: I like the exit from the middle eight as well (although we all know what it’s missing – just imagine it at 2:26, “on top of the WORLD!”), and I’d have thought the dancing would be enough. So really, sixth? SIXTH?

Tom: Yep. Sixth.

Tim: Ugh.

Platnum – Love You Tomorrow

“Let’s have some BASSLINE.”

Tom: Yep, they’re still going. It surprised me too. Let’s have some BASSLINE.

Tom: Huh. For a group categorised under ‘bassline’, either my headphones aren’t working properly, or they’ve turned down the bass a bit.

Tim: Wasn’t entirely sure what ‘bassline’, so I checked Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia that anyone can edit – even PR reps.

Tom: If Wikipedia works as it should, then by the time our readers click that link, all that self-promotional guff will have disappeared. We can only hope.

Tim: Well, it’s been there since June so I wouldn’t get to excited. OH WELL NEVER MIND.

Tom: Aside from blatantly borrowing the “naming the days of the week” thing from the Black Eyed Peas’ “I Got A Feeling” – only not quite finishing the job – this can get filed under Generic Dance Love Song.

Tim: I would argue: Somewhat Above Average Generic etc. It’s certainly no Thousand Suns or Colors, but it’s pretty good.

Tim: Yep, it’s a pretty good song as these things go. It’ll get remixed a dozen times – one of the more bass-filled mixes is going to be more my tastes – and it’ll go down well amongst the Dance Nation crowd.

Tom: HELLO!

Tim: It’s probably not going to trouble the charts – most of their tracks don’t – but that doesn’t mean it’s not any good.

Rivaz – Colors

“Crikey, that’s not bad at all.”

Tim: Two days ago we had a superb dance track; today we have one that certainly thinks it’s superb. Arguably the most confident dance track of the week; the SoundCloud blurb from this Italian DJ says that “with the plethora of tracks being released on a weekly basis, it’s often difficult to cut through the clutter.” This is true, but it goes on. “So when you hear a track that makes you stop, listen and feel something, you know there’s a magical moment – like the first time you heard ‘Bromance,’ or for us long time punters ‘Children’ or ‘Sunchyme’.”

Now that sounds fairly self-confident.

Tom: That’s not just a bold claim, that’s a claim etched in thousand-point bold font on the side of the White Cliffs of Dover. Children and Sunchyme weren’t just something special, they were generation-defining tracks. It’s a fair bet that Bromance is becoming something similar. It’s one hell of a claim.

Tim: BUT IS IT JUSTIFIED?

Tim: Why, yes, it bloody is.

Tom: Crikey, that’s not bad at all.

Tim: It’s a long time since I’ve heard a dance track that’s really made me pay attention to it, and I could write quite a lot about it. But I won’t; what I’ll do instead (and this may seem lazy) is copy and paste the rest of the blurb, because, over-hyped as these things typically are, this time it’s about right.

“Truly uplifting and euphoric, the track lifts your spirits and takes you into that magical place that is light and full of happiness and energy. He even manages to bring in some rock guitar riffs without it sounding angry or aggressive, keeping it pretty and dreamy. Sure, there are the expected builds to electro and a few stadium house stabs, but the sound is so fresh and optimistic feeling that it stands out amongst the sea of clones.”

Tom: I don’t know if all that hype is justified. It’s a cracking track, don’t get me wrong, it’s probably going to be one of the anthems of this summer and end up in the background of every BBC Three teenage-documentary show next year. But is it a Bromance? Or a Children, or a Sunchyme? It’s too early to make that call.

Tim: Too early, definitely, but I don’t think I’d bet big money against it.

Tom: Anything else you want to copy and paste?

Tim: This is the kind of track that makes me want to get up and dance. Immediately. An entire album like this, please. Also immediately.

Tom: Fair enough.

Phoenix – Entertainment

“Wake up to the radio, think ‘ooh, this is pleasant'”

Tim: Standard story: wake up to the radio, hear it in a half-asleep state, think ‘ooh, this is pleasant’ and then find out what it was. A French band, which has somehow out of nowhere made it onto the Radio 1 B-list. (And Tom, you’ll want to skip the first 25 seconds.)

Tom: Skipped.

Tim: Standard story number 2: I don’t really know what’s going on in the video, and I don’t really mind, because it’s all about the music. The lyrics also are a bit of a mish-mash, but again, it’s the music that takes pride of place, because it really is cracking.

Tom: Really? That surprises me. It just seems over-distorted and a bit atonal to me. What stands out for you?

Tim: Well, while it’s perhaps not all that memorable, that’s largely because there’s a lot of it – it’s fast and fairly aggressive, but in a slightly dreamy manner (emphasised by the vocals). Until I’d heard this I’d have thought that was a somewhat ludicrous combination, but it really seems to work for me here. Very pleasant indeed.

Tom: It’s one of those tracks that – while I can understand why other people might like it – doesn’t engage me at all. Still, to each their own.

Chicane & Ferry Corsten feat. Christian Burns – One Thousand Suns

“Makes me want to get up and dance. Immediately.”

Tom: Bloody hell. Chicane. Ferry Corsten. Working together. How did I not hear about this earlier?

Tim: No idea, but I didn’t either.

Tom: Actually, the reason I didn’t hear about it earlier is that the original track got released last year – and while it’s a gorgeous bit of uplifting EDM, it didn’t make much of a splash elsewhere. So they’ve done the same as the track we reviewed yesterday – and given it some vocals.

Tim: Ooh, that’s very nice indeed; it still is a lovely bit of uplifting EDM.

Tom: I’ve gone for the Soundprank Vocal Remix here, on the grounds that it’s more to my tastes than the original. Your mileage may vary, but it it does, then you’re wrong.

Tim: Haha, lovely. Although that version does have a quiet bit that the vocals belong in; to be honest in this mix it seems like they’ve just been thrown on top, rather than being an actual part of the tune. It’s not a bad thing – they’re perfectly good, fitting, and they don’t detract – but they seem to come with a sense of separation, and I slightly prefer the original for that reason.

Tom: This is the kind of track that makes me want to get up and dance. Immediately. An entire album like this, please. Also immediately.

Tim: Immediately.

John Dahlbäck feat. Agnes – Life (Diamonds In The Dark)

“Well, that’s a lot better than the original.”

Tim: About a year ago, Swedish DJ John Dahlbäck brought out Life, a dance track that didn’t take the world by storm but was still fairly good. Twelve months later, there’s Agnes doing some vocal work and a video to wrap it all up nicely.

Tom: Well, that’s a lot better than the original.

Tim: Indeed – it’s safe to say the original somewhat pales in comparison, and it kind of underlines the fact that while there are lots of good instrumental dance track out there, many could be made a lot better by sticking a vocalist on.

Tom: As Avicii proved so well with ‘Seek Bromance‘.

Tim: We still have the decent dance tune below it, but now also some good singing on the top. Most of the time you can appreciate the pleasant melodies, the decent crafting and melding of the two, and the picturesque shots in the video. And when you’re drunk, you can sing along with the howling and wailing bits. Something for everyone.

Tom: It’s not a floor-filler as far as I can tell, but it’s not a floor-killer either.

Tim: Oh, and that annoying bit at the end is a throwback to the original with the two minutes of intro and outro for mixing. Less annoying if you think about it, though, as it’s now the bit that a radio DJ will talk over and not ruin a chorus.

Tom: “You’re listening to DANCE FM. How’s YOUR Saturday going? Text and let us know, we want to hear from YOU. PLEASE. We’re DESPERATE.”

Tim: Reminds me of a DJ who filled in for Dev on the Radio 1 early breakfast show for one week a while back; text-in theme was, on Monday, the ever-inventive game of hairdresser puns. You know, A Cut Above, Curl Up and Dye, etc. Because that was so brilliant, Tuesday was fish and chip places, Wednesday was kebab shops, and by Friday we’d sunk to tanning salons. “We’re going to start you off with Tanerife, but what have you got?” Answer, going by what was read out over the next hour and the increasing anguish in his voice: absolutely nothing. He wasn’t invited back.

Saturday Reject: Louise Dubiel – Rejs Dig Op

“Try and keep your legs still.”

Tim: Back to Denmark, and another demonstration of what a highlight that night was. And here’s a challenge for you: try and keep your legs still while you watch this. (Starts about a minute in.)

Tom: Hmm. My legs stayed still, but it’s still a good track.

Tim: So, the drums give it a bit of a military feel (and make it a great song to accompany a forceful walk), but her looking like that and the backing singers with their wo-oh-oh-ooh-oh give it so much more of a party atmosphere, and I think it’s brilliant.

It’s also ridiculously amazing to dance to – I didn’t really get it so much the first time I heard it, but listened to it whilst waiting for a bus home one night and realised that my legs, all of themselves, were trying to do some sort of dance to it.

Tom: Really? Sorry to fixate on this, but I can’t see this working in a club: the BPM might work for some kind of modern impressionistic dance, but at 1am with a drunk crowd?

Tim: Oh, you’re right there – in a club this wouldn’t really work at all because there’d be arms and heads flailing and that wouldn’t suit it.

But the other night, it might have been slightly because I was on my way home from seeing Singin’ In The Rain so felt in a slightly dancey mood, but since there was no-one else around I though “sod it” and did my damed hardest to tapdance the shit out of this song, and it was BRILLIANT.

Tom: “Tapdance the shit out of this song”. Tim ‘Fred Astaire’ Jeffries, there.

Tim: Oh, and then there’s the key change.

Tom: It’s a good key change.

ColorKaleido – Magic Mind

“What on earth?”

Tim: Fairly new Danish duo; in October they put out a fairly dreary piano ballad (which I suppose is fine if you like that sort of thing), but this follow-up is actually worth listening to.

Tom: What on earth?

Tim: Well, yes – they’ve sort of got a ‘let’s all be happy with nature’ hippy thing going on in the video which let’s be honest is just a bit silly and always irritating, and there’s really no need for those masks, but the kids seem to be enjoying themselves so that’s something.

Tom: Yep, I had to put that video in the background so I wasn’t too grumpy about the whole thing. Without it, the song’s not bad – not my kind of thing, but there’s nothing wrong with it.

Tim: The music is nice, with a passionate chorus, drums beating nicely and chirpy guitaring going on. Happy verses, with talk of elephants and all sorts, and despite the “I watch you stalker” message it’s made a bit nicer with the “I love you so”, assuming it’s somewhat reciprocated.

And I shall assume that, because I like this song and I don’t want to ruin it.

Tom: Well, I’m reading it as a parent-to-child song, rather than a traditional ‘stalker’ or ‘partner’ one. Does that ruin it for you?

http://www.europlop.co.uk/?p=1293&preview=true

Tim: Oh. Oh, actually that makes it sound lovely. Oh, I like that idea, that’s nice. Hmm. Although I do worry for the children’s upbringing.