Tim: Earlier this week, I wrote of Sam Smith’s track that “there is precisely one person who comes out of this endeavour well, and that’s Madonna, because Die Another Day doesn’t appear quite as atrocious as it previously did.” But let’s put that to the test.
Tom: Why did we put that to the test, Tim?
Tim: Um…yeah, I’m not really sure. There’s really no rescuing that track, is there?
Tom: I remember watching that in the cinema, already a bit baffled by the bizarre opening, and… well, look, it summed up the film too.
Tim: Although, well, somehow it did did get nominated for actual proper awards like Golben Globes and Grammys, so I don’t know how on earth that happened. Listen to it: it’s dull and repetitive and the autotune is near-unbearable; it might just work as a dance track, but it’s way too stilted and stuttery. I really don’t know – have you got anything good for it?
Tom: Nothing, just like the film.